Untitled (May 10, 2012)

Still ring true today, as it did than.

Am
But another stat
On a long list
Of names
Battling
Mental illness.

Shall
You ask me
When I noticed this
For the first time
Would have to answer
My early childhood.

A
Time filled
With too many occurrences
Which I found myself
Withdrawing inward.

Where
Abuse and fears
Became a normal part
Of my childhood.

Colouring
My every movement
And thought.

Where
Self-hatred
And low self-esteem
Has become
My norm.

Harshly
Questioning
And second guessing
Every decision
And move
I made.

Where
Timidity replaced
Boldness.

As
My needs
And desires
Take a backseat
To others.

Until now
Am left hollow
Inside.

Looking
Needing to fill
The void
Replacing darkness
With light.