Clueless

When the service ends

I feel nothing

but r e l i e f.

For three weeks I had been dreading the funeral.

I couldn't even imagine

watching her getting buried.

It hurt every part of my body

when they did.

But now that it's over.

I just want to go home.

But now people are forming a line,

where her family is standing,

to give them condolences.

People hug them.

People cry.

People sniffle.

People hug them again.

People tell them how sorry they are.

Seeing them

puts a lump in my throat.

It makes it hard to breathe.

it makes it hard to move.

None of them know

how it really feels to be sorry.

They can't possibly know.

I was her best friend.

I watched her die.

Don't I get a line?