Good Night Tales With Mama Goose: Humpty Dumpty

this is my spin on the classic Humpty Dumpty tale. ignore grammer mistakes. please review. thanks.

 

 

 

After five years of childhood wonderment and that ever-present "little boy inquisitivesness," there was still one thing that stumped me. Every night, of every day, of every month, of every week, my grammy gram would always kneel by her bed, close her eyes, and smile for 5 minutes. Every time I asked her what she was doing, she always answered "David, I'm an old woman. I've experienced the ups and downs of life. I need to thank SOMEONE." I never understand what she meant. Until I was 17. But that's another story. Wait, no it's not. It's this story.

If there was one thing that I did understand, it was story time.

It was one of those warm, breezy summer days that remind you constantly just how blissful summer is. Probably what made summer so perfect, was of course, the fact that there was no school. I could do whatever I wanted. This summer was not particularly differrent. I was 17.

"Hey, you guys wanna drink?"

"Yeah sure." they all answered.

All four of us thundered down the stairs and into the kitchen for some drinks. It was just my childhood friends Kev, Joe, and Nick and I. We always hung out together. In the clutterred kitchen sat my grammy gram on her antique wooden chair laughing at the TV.

"Hey Ma goose. What's up?"

"Hey boys. Havin' Fun?"

"Ma goose? Why do call her that?"

"I donno. She used to always tell me stories when I was little. Still does. So, I call her Mama Goose, after Mother Goose. She tells the greatest stories.

"Speakin' of stories, how you boys like to hear one?"

"That sounds great Gram!"

"Uh, don't you think we're a little too old for bedtime stories?" questioned Joe.

"They're not bedtime stories," I answered," they're Good Night Tales!"

"What are those?"

"You'll see. Mwahaha! C'mon Gram, tell us one."

"Ok ok. This one is called.... Humpty Dumpty...."

"Humpty Dumpty?!" exclaimed Nick with a confused look on his face, " I've heard that a million times."

"Not like this you haven't." answered Grammy with a diabolic look....

Once upon a time, there was a young egg named Steve......"

 

 

After five years of constant torment, emotionally-destructive juvenile delinquency by his peers, ripped underwear, and toilet water-soaked hair, Steve sighed. He was tired. Very tired.

He was tired of it all. Of all the change. All the pain. And it all started five years ago, when his family and him moved out of Fridgeville and into Cabinet City. His dad had grown tired of the mediocracy and wanted something differrent. He was tired of seeing eggs everywhere. Just how Steve was tired of being ridiculed for being differrent.

There were no eggs in Cabinet City. There were only non-perishable foods here. Which made perfect sense. What didn't make sense was why he and his family were there. They were perishable. Within days he knew they would die. But like always, his dad wanted to take a ride on the wild side. He said we'd be fine since we brought our own giant plastic bag which would "surely keep us safe bucko." His dad hasn't been right in the head ever since his mom passed away.

There he was again. Sitting on the same old ledge in the same old place. He liked to call his hang out "The Shelf." He had had another bad day at the local high school. The students there are merciless. All they do is ridicule, play pranks, and annoy him all day. He was sick and tired of it. He had to do something. He knew he did. He felt his heart beat faster and faster as he thought about it. It was so exhilirating. He was actually excited. He knew he had to do something. And he was going to finally stand up to them. His dad had always told him that it was wrong to fight back. He always told him that peace and love is the answer. But then again, he was always drunk whenever he said that.

Steve didn't want to open his eyes. He knew what was happenning that day. He knew this was going to be it. He could feel it in his soul. It was time. But it wasn't going to be easy.

He could feel his pulse shoot out of his skin as he entered his classroom later that day. He slowly crept to his usual seat and plopped himself down, staring around the room paranoid. After a few minutes before classes started, his usual hecklers of powdered drinks and peanuts showed up into the room. They circled him like vultures, waiting for him to perish. But Steve kept his cool. Well, sorta.

"Wow. I didn't think you'd show up Omelet!" chuckled a tall, mean-looking boy in yellow.

"Hey there Nanners."

"It's Dole! And don't you forget it! What are you still doin' here Omelet? We told you to leave. We don't want you here."

"I don't know. You guys have grown on me." smirked Steve with a grin.

"Are you giving me smack boy? No one messes with me."

"So that's what happened to your last boyfriend."

The next moment happened so fast, Steve didn't realize what had happened until he was leaning his back against the locker in the hallway, bleeding from the lip.

"I hope this will teach you not to mess with Dole ever again." screamed Dole, flinging him against the lockers.

But his devious grin suddenly dropped when he saw Steve standing upright, staring deep into his eyes with a look that told him what he said right afterwards: "I'm not takin' your s**t anymore Dole. It's time you got what's coming to you."

Steve stood there, a few feet in front of Dole, trembling with fear and excitement. Dole was trembling too.... with laughter.

"Holy crap. Hahahaha." laughed Dole. " Where the hell did that come from? Since when do you have balls Omelet?"

"My name is not Omelet.... It's Steve.."

The next moment happened twice as fast as the last one. So fast that the next thing he knew, Dole was laying on the floor, nose bleeding, and Omelet's, I mean Steve's, fist was red with pain. He couldn't believe it. He did it. He was ecstatic. But Dole's lackeys weren't. They were not ecstatic at all.

And with that, Steve ran for his life. He dodged students, lockers, and chairs until he reached the outside of the school where he dodged trees, bushes, and people. It might've been 5 minutes since he left the school or it might've been 50 minutes since he left the school, he really had no idea. But he knew where to go where no one would find him... The Shelf.

And he was right. Steve had been staying at The Shelf for almost 30 minutes now. He was sure that they had given up. Steve felt a good feeling. It felt like.... security. Even though he knew he would die tomorrow, he still felt.... secure. It was a good feeling. Steve liked it. But that was about to end. Because right when Steve got up to leave, there stood Dole and his gang.

"I told you you were gonna regret this. Say goodbye Omelet."

Steve wasn't afraid anymore. He faced them head on. He fought hard. Well, as hard as he could. Which wasn't much. He was no match for his gang of powdered drinks. Everything happened so fast, Steve had forgotten then they were on a cliff. With a 3-foot-drop. And that.... he regretted. The fight had gotten a little too much to handle when Dole accidentally pushed

Steve

off

the

Shelf

The gang was in a panic. They had never done anything like this before. The group ran around screaming when they saw Steve on the ground splatterred into too many pieces to count. They didn't know what to do.... except run. Which they did.

THE END.

"The End?!!? What kinda ending is that? What happened to Steve?"

"Ahehehehe. I was just pullin' your legs boys. It's not over. Here's the rest of the story...."

It was nothing short of a miracle that Steve was still alive. No, it was much more than a miracle. It's like.....an impossible miracle.

"Uh Gram. Isn't that redundant?"

"Quiet boy, I'm tellin the story. Anyway...."

It was unbelievable. The police, medics, and a huge crowd gathered at the shatterred remains of Steve The Egg. They were trying to revive him. But sadly... could not. Suddenly, a loud vibrant horn sounded which was explained by the arrival of the King of Cabinet City, King Karrot. When he saw the catastrophe, he was flabbergasted.

"Flabbergasted? Not a word Mrs. Goliath."

"Yes it is."

"No it's not."

"Yes it is."

"Not it's not."

"Would you boys be quiet??!!! I'm tellin' a story here!"

"Sorry." We said in unison.

The King ordered his horses and all of his men to help put Steve back together again. But alas, like the medics, they could not. The head doctor, Dr. Mansanas, told the king, the only way to revive Steve was for him to put himself back together. Which did not make any sense whatsoever. But the Dr. said it was true. The crowd stood and cheered Steve to put himself back togethered.

Steve could hear them all but he had no idea how to do it! His hands, arms, and fingers where all over the place, even his brain. Which was probably why he did not know what to do. All Steve could do was close his eyes (which were a few feet away) and hope that something miraculous would happen. And if the fact that he was alive, breathing, a talking egg, and closing his eyes wasn't miraculous enough, the fact that the pieces of his body were magically putting themselves together with no visible help whatsoever, makes this story completely unbelievable!!!

The crowd's jaws were so far dropped that they could taste the sidewalk. What occurred at that moment in time could only be described as..... creepy. Within seconds, Steve was put back together in one piece, safe and sound. He couldn't believe it himself.....

With a long, tired yet joyous sigh, Steve plopped down in his usual seat. When the Nanner Gang popped in. Just when Steve braced himself for another beating, he received something he thought he'd never ever ever ever reveive from Dole..... a smile.

"I'm so sorry man. I'm sorry for treatin' ya badly for bein' differrent. Things will be differrent from now man. I promise."

"Gee. Thanks Dole."

"No prob, buddy. How would you like to be one of us?"

"Uh, no thanks man. I'm good."

"C'mon. Please. We'll even give you a nickname. Mmmm. How about Humpty Dumpty?"

"Actually, that' my real name."

"Oh. Weird.... Hey Humpty.."

"Yeah?"

"How'd you survive that fall?"

"Dole. Foolish, foolish Dole. Everything you want is within your grasp. Just reach out and grab it."

"Huh?"

"What? I didn't say anything." said Humpty confused.

THE END.

"Wow. That was great Gramma Goliath!" said Kev.

"Yeah. Amazing." agreed Joe.

Nick nodded.

"Great story, gram."

"No problem boys. Just come by anytime you wanna hear another Good Night Tale."

"Sure. We'll do that." I answered.

I always enjoyed Gram's tales. They were great. When I was a kid, they would take me to a whole new world where evil did not exist. But there's was always something that puzzled me..... Is it me... or do Grammy Gram's Good Night Tales sound familiar?

THE End. FOR REAL.

 

Reviews

[Rebecca Chamaillard]

I really liked this. What a contemporary twist on a classic nursery rhyme. Nicely done! I enjoyed reading this, it really gave a moral to the tale. I love the way you used first person narrative at the beginning and end too. I hope you carry on with Ma Goose's tales, I really enjoyed reading it. Very well done.

[sutoraika]

haha, soem dark elements make story time oh so goody. hehehe