Break Free

There are certain things in this demented world

that only this chaste heart of mine could see

It's the way my feeble eyes shimmer

whenever our eyes meet

It's the way my heart jumps with joy

whenever we are so close together

But It's the way my heart breaks 

when you talk about the others

You may never notice how giddy I get

whenever you pass my way

You may not notice the way I stop and stare

and watch you brush your fingers through your hair

But when I think about you, I wonder

"Do I ever cross your mind too?"

And when our eyes meet at some point, I say

"Are these eyes the eyes of someone you'd possibly love?"

Because I tell you, you just shine through

You transcend each faded light

And In your heart you bring such goodness

And in your face I see God's greatness

If you think I'm crazy, well yes I might be

But I tell you for this time I'm scared

Because this holding back isn't that easy

When all you wanted to do was break free

Reviews

[Bee]

Love the ending. There are some cliche lines though, but I thought it turned out fine:
a.) "You may not notice the way I stop and stare
and watch you brush your fingers through your hair"
b.) "But when I think about you, I wonder
"Do I ever cross your mind too?"

Just my opinion. :p

Break free from a love that went unnoticed... Ouch.
Nice poem.

[TheHeartOfLife]

@lonesome traveler: Thank you so much! I've read your poems and I think they're awesome too! :) @bee: Thanks for that comment :) I can use your constructive criticism for my next poems. :D @jedidaiah: Awww! Thanks! :) I'm glad that you liked the poem. The last line was actually rushed though :) I actually am very sleepy when I was making this poem but then again, thanks! ;)

[thoughts of jade]

because this holding back isn't that easy when all you wanted to do was break free...
I love that line... seems that your some one special doesn't seem to notice you.. don't worry, i bet he's thinking of you too... I've been in that kind of situation before... keep writing and GOD BLESS

[Lonesome Traveler]

Wow... What I see here is.. You see someone.. that you think doesn't mind you..

Well.. I think he's thinking about you too! Don't worry!

Continue writing poems like these! Godspeed!