Relapse

Sometimes people are as toxic as a drug, and just as hard to quit.

I was addicted to you once, got you into my system no matter what form it was. I would always find a way to get my fix.

I stuck a used needle into my arm, and felt you pour into my bloodstream. Later, my arm got infected where I let you in.

I breathed in the smoke you made with a sigh, and then felt my chest ache for days from coughing up the junk I inhaled.

I threw back my head and let you fall down my throat, relishing the feeling as it went down. I spent the next few hours bent over a toilet, spewing out my insides.

I decided to quit you once. I threw out every poisonous version of you I had available. I cried for days from the withdrawal. 

I had a huge support group, every day they told me how strong I was for stopping. What they didn't know was how desperately I missed my high.

I spent months cleaning myself up, found a new life without you. Everyone was so proud of me, but they never knew how often I thought of you.

I walked from home to the grocery store, grabbed what I needed and left. Then on the way back I saw you and I hid in the alley and cried for hours.

I lay in bed and tried to get some sleep, but images of you floated through my brain. Why couldn't you just leave me be? I was finally ok without you...

I tried to go to work today, but my boss found me crying in the backroom. I told him about you. He let me go home early.

I went back to my support group, I couldn't open my mouth. I didn't even dare mention you because I knew what they would say. It was always the same.

I decided to try you once more, it wasn't all bad when you were around, was it? I spend the next three days crying. 

Reviews

[Decidious wind]

Wow! The poem's theme is very contemporary. I think you are trying to hint at abusive relationships and how the abused cannot "just leave" it's because they feel something for that person although they are aware that the relationship is toxic. when we are gone all of us.. its poem like this that are going to be studied and remembered. excellent job