Just Shuttup!

Ugh...seriously though...put a f*****g sock in it...

Their voices

surround me

like the muggy air

that I breathe.

 

Opinions

assumptions

factless rants

scratch on the inside of my head,

ripping guages

in truth.

 

My friends,

his friends,

are trying desperately

to convince me

to drown

in fake love.

 

I wonder if they know

that with every word

that flys out

of their filthy mouths

I come closer and closer

to falling into the dark pit

of despair

they're ripped open.

 

Nothing is private anymore.

Secrets are just a silly joke

little girls whisper

in the dark.

 

It's hilarious

that I once trusted

thses monsters

who run away

at teh first whisper

on the idea

that they might be wrong.

Be gone.

 

The decison I plotted

so carefully

with so much thought,

cemented by time.

is being ripped apart,

torn off its foundation.

 

Pushed to the edge,

I strange the throats

that push their screams

to me.

 

"Be gone"

I whiser quietly,

as the lifeless bodies

fall to the floor.

Reviews

[David Winters]

Wow. This is an amazing peom. A while back I was reading through some of your work and I didnt read this one mostly because the title was rather uninteresting... sounded like a lame poem to be honest. Now, however, I understand that this is quite an amazing peom. I really like the dark feeling this peom gives as you read it. There are few minor problems with it though. There are lots of spelling and mistyping mistakes that can easily be located and fixed if you read through it. Anyway, I relly liked this poem. I really liked the haunting feeling. Especially the last stanza: "Be gone" I whisper (you need to fix that spelling issue) quietly, as the lifeless bodies fall to the floor. There's something I really like about the fact that soemthing, rather someone, was alive at the beginning of the poem, but nothing more than a lifeless body at the end. I'm a creeper, I know.

[Henry Clemmons]

Th ending here is masterful, for true. "Be gone" I whisper quietly as lifeless bodies fall to the floor. I think with knowing you had that power, I'd just shut up. But, then us writers can make anything happen. ENjoyed the read.

[MoriartyMesa]

Nice Poem! JUST SHUTTUP! reads like fight waiting to happen, sounds like a MOTORHEAD song. Love it, Love it, if i was to lay a track of music to read this to, it would have to be DOCTOR ROCK. Good Job!

[aaron]

fed up...i know the feeling.

[Lily Mae]

I love it I've felt this way a time or two.. :) x

[Mariel]

This just simply blew me away, you wrote a beautiful poem. The way it goes, the words are beautiful and very rich. Wonderful poem!

[HopelesslyDevoted]

It's hilarious
that I once trusted
thses monsters
who run away
at teh first whisper
on the idea
that they might be wrong.
Be gone.

i can relate to this line a lot. it sucks that we find people who think we can trust and then sooner or later we find out that the only reason they wanted us to trust them is so they could try to get us to be more like them instead of like our own indivual selves. its stupid, but its the way most people work i guess.
fantastic poem! :)

[zappy]

Wow great poem .

[Steve]

Sometimes dont you just want to run off and hide? I know those thoughts enter my mind at times. I like the intensity of this write. You speak the truth here.