Why?

Just a little something that came out today.... must be one of those creative days. :)

Why?

I lived my life like I could never die

Always knowing it was a lie

On Deaths door step too many times

How did I make it?  Must have been the rhymes

Too many times I was so close to death

Convulsing on the ground gasping for breath

But I did make it and left the drugs behind

I have changed my life and become refined

****

Looking back on the people I hurt

Good friends died buried in the dirt 

So why did I live and they died

It makes me so sad I start to slide

****

Lets hope I don't slid too far

End up on drugs at another bar

I will not let my addiction win

Just push it down with my grin

Author's Note

any feedback is good feedback

Reviews

[Tina Kline]

I like this. Very upbeat with the hope of never going back to that lifestyle and the struggle not to go back. Nice job.

[Aimee Mahathy]

I liked the separation of the stanzas. There was a very distinct beginning, middle, and end. I liked that. :3
The images here are so dark and so vivid, especially in the lines about convulsing... if that's not reality, I don't know what is.
I loved this!
And hey, a smile is a great weapon in that war! :D

[Sandra Dawn]

There is so much power and intensity in this poem! It keeps a steady beat in my mind, which is always an excellent thing in a poem. I agree that it could use a little grammatical touch-up, but it shows that it was really raw emotion touching the page...not just something you threw together on a whim.

[Alessander]

for the most part, it's solid - true rhymes, a good beat, intriguing content. However, this poem has some typos or grammar stuff that stalled me a bit when I read it. first off, I think you meant "slide" and not "slid" "so what did I live and they die (not died for rhyme's sake); and I'm not sure people go to bars for drugs (I know alcohol is TECHNICALLY a drug, etc). Other than that, this is very raw and intense, with a slight mix of the character self-pitying while trying to make a stand.

[Alicante lullaby]

such a message.a very thought provoking poem...you r an inspiration...

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

There is a remarkable courage in this piece. I could see the backdrop of a city skyline..bridges and all of the old memories in black and white. This is an epiphany and an amazing rebirth.

[Liva Mary]

Wow nice emotion to it. Really fits the hard times in life don't it? Ha will I love it!

[Emily B]

I have stared at death many times. Even as a child I knew that it wasn't time for me yet. I've never done drugs, it has never made me sad. When my time to die comes, I hope that I will meet it with all the grace I can muster. I think that because I have been spared it must mean that there is a purpose for me here.

We have to make our lives mean something. We have to work to make it mean. And, yeah, we slide sometimes. That's part of the learning curve.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

The word "slide" needs an e at the end. WHY? Because "slid" is past tense. lol

[Chris Lotus]

I like the determination and strength portrayed here (also in some of your other work as well). Life is most definitely is a mystery and you choose to live it the best you can. Push away the addictions, oppositions, and the demons that haunt you. Excellent piece and message.