All

This is just a fun poem. Hope you enjoy :)

All

Up and down, down and up

Look around and see a cup

It is full so please don't spill

Need that water to take my pill

Pop that pill to catch a thrill

Then I'll run down that hill

Start to fall then I roll

Find myself down a hole

Look around no way out

So I start to scream and shout

This couldn't get much worse

I'm alive, don't call a hearse

Author's Note

All feedback is good feedback. So I would love to know if you like it or hate it.

Reviews

[Joy Lynn B.]

This is really simple! Great write!

[Levioshock]

very nice

[Tina Kline]

I like the humor in it, it's like if it can go wrong, it will.

[A.Lee]

I kind of agree that the last two lines were a tad bit off, but overall I really liked this! It made me smile the whole way as I'm imagining this person doing these things. Taking a pill and going running down the hill and falling and rolling into a hole, haha. Nice work. You did a good job keeping the rhyme from sounding too cheesy.

[Not A Writer]

Pretty good. Good rhyme scheme and story line. Must have took some time on this. Anyways good job.

[♍ Kirstin ♎]

I quite liked this but becuase of your constant use of rhyme I don't really think that the last two lines fit together, it feels like there should be at least an other line between them.

[Jade (insanity)]

Well, this one wasn't one of my favorites of yours but it seemed to me that you feel/felt in the dark and alone then again, you may have been in a really good mood :] great job.
Keep writing,
Jade

[Brianna Brie]

Yes, it is. It is a chuckle feel good poem. Great!

[MissWordSmith]

one word. FANTASTIC
i just love how it was sing-song yet so deep!

[Adrianna]

awesome poem man i absouluetly love it.