BETRAYED

loving someone and hurting someone are choices

EARLY WARNING SIGNS

The kisses between us are few and far between.Your lips that once tasted so sweet, are now bitter.Your smile, once so welcoming, I see now is your mask. Your body you gave to me freely, is now at your leisure.Sometimes at arms length. What happened to our small talk and long conversations about nothing? About everything. There is no talking at all now. This is a quiet partnership and we are both familiar strangers...

DISCOVERY

This...is...real.Not a dream.I feel...numb.You. You...Him...Naked.I can't breathe...Your face...Shame? Regret? I see you speaking to me, but I can't hear your lying words. I look at him. He's dumbfounded.I look back at you.In shock.Crying...Another mask.There is a rage inside of me.GROWING. I will not be able to contain this I have to leave.NOW...

THE DAY AFTER

Your phone calls go unanswered. You do not return home without my permission. You know better. This is a time for self inventory. I want to reflect on my mistakes. But what did I do?...Did I not love you enough? Is there something wrong with me I can't see in myself? Do you hate me? Do you hate me that much?... So tired. Why do I let this phone keep ringing? Why don't I put it on mute or just turn it off? Maybe I don't want to get up. Maybe I just want to sit here forever. If I move, I might break into a thousand pieces. How am I still alive when I can't feel my own heart beating?

MIND GAMES

Did he get the best of you like I used to?Maybe I didn't get your best at all. Maybe you held back on me and gave him everything of yourself. I know what your mouth can do. I know what your body can do. You told me all your fantasies. Did he fulfill them for you when I couldn't. Was he...the only one? It's a quick thought... I need an explanation.

CONFRONTATION

You say it didn't mean anything, but it meant everything. It was not planned, but you never intended to stop it from happening.You say he was the only one. You promise. But what does that mean to me now? Your trust.Trust you didn't cheat on me with somebody else more than once? You try to rationalize with me.Yes I've been tempted. Those thoughts were seriously considered. But I never wanted you where I'm at now. Betrayed and broken. Whatever pain I'm feeling now you probably would have felt worse. But this is not your moment. It's mine

A TIME TO HEAL AND WONDER

Whatever there was between us is gone. But does it have to remain so? Our relationship became dull and stagnant. That became the cause but the effect destroyed us. Choices were made. I was oblivious, you were deceitful. But what of us now? Do we wallow in pity or start to build something new? How do you hate someone you would give your life for? Even now. We are on speaking terms now but our connection is fragile at best. Although you seem sincerely regretful, I wonder if this is your mask of confusion. Are you apologetic from the heart or from a darker place from being caught in the first place...I don't know what to think and I hate this...I hate this.

RESOLUTION

The image of you and another remains in my mind. There was a considerable length of time on my part hesitating before I interrupted your rendezvous. There were genuine sounds of pleasure coming from you both in that room.This was going to happen whether intentional or not... But the cliche is true. Time heals all wounds. But this wound took the longest to heal because it was cut so deep. So now what? Look back or look ahead. We can never replace what we had especially trust. But we can start new again with something different from both of us. It would be a leap of faith especially on my part. But it would be my decision on my terms... So what about you? About us? There is forgiveness. I can feel it when we're together now. I can feel it when I look in your eyes. I want to forgive you. I think I'm at the point where I do. Do you need to hear the words? Do i give you that satisfaction... She's looking at me. More than concerned reading my face. Waiting for my decision... But it won't be today... Let her wait...

Author's Note

The ingredients for this recipe was a tablespoon of real life but mostly fiction

Reviews

[Diane]

Wow the emotion is real and raw here.

[Dave]

For fiction you have one hell of an imagination! No, I believe the agonizing throes you feel, the hurt, the anguish have all been born of a betrayal never seen coming. Trust me, I know whereof I speak. Good luck to you.

Take care - Dave

[Viana T]

Wow, mostly fiction? I could feel you here.
Love this "Although you seem sincerely regretful, I wonder if this is your mask of confusion. Are you apologetic from the heart or fr.om a darker place from being caught in the first place...I don't know what to think and I hate this."
I can relate to this.

[Coyote Poetry]

Mask or not. When the two people forget was held them closer. Hard to find the proper place. A powerful story. You left something for the reader to think about. Thank you for sharing the amazing words and thoughts.
Coyote