Mourning

Funerals of Aerie's lost Nephilim and fallen, healing, other stuff.

Heimdall took Noah to the infirmary and lay him down on one of the last empty beds there.  Tears continued to fall from the boy's eyes, never seeming to stop.  Heimdall was tempted to admonish him for his weeping, but he knew it was cruel.  The boy had nothing left.  He had every right to a few moments of falling apart.

As soon as Heimdall let go of him, Noah rolled of the bed and scrambled for the door, screaming, "DON'T HEAL ME, HEIMDALL!!  I DON'T WANT THIS LIFE ANYMORE!!"

Heimdall sighed and looked at the boy.  He locked the door and froze the gears with a single thought.  "I will not let you give up on what you still have, Noah."

Noah reached the door and tried the knob.  Finding it was locked, he tried to break it off.  It still didn't work.  Noah thumped his head on the door, crying harder. "Why?  Why is it always me?" His voice was nearly a hoarse whisper.

Heimdall walked across the room and squeezed Noah's shoulder.  "That is a question we all ask ourselves at one point or another.  But, you know that life goes on after you lose someone.  It is a cliche, but it is true.  You lost Autumn, your love, and yet you managed to move on and find another.  You had loved Autumn much more than you had yet come to love Dakota and you moved on.  You will find someone else to share your life with, Noah.  Don't worry.  You still have plenty left here.  It is not the best life, but you still have something.  Be glad you still live and breathe.  Be glad you are fed and clothed and bathed.  Be glad you have company.  Live your life powerfully, Noah.  Become a hero of your kind.  Make use of your angel blood."

Noah was healed by the next morning.  He lay on his stomach in his bed of blue sheets, his face dry and crusted with the paths of dried tears.  He felt so hollowed out and tired from the battle and the losses of the two girls who had been the last things he had in life.  The worst part was that the funerals would be taking place today and into tomorrow.  He didn't want to get up.  He didn't want to watch as the fallen carried Koda's body to her grave in a white silk sheet with the symbol of the Nephilim embroidered in gold thread on it.  He didn't want to hear the funeral psalms and songs and speeches.  Noah wanted to lay in bed and stare at the ceiling, thinking about all the moments he'd had with Autumn and Koda. 

He took a deep breath and rolled onto his opposite side, staring at his white carpet.

Someone knocked softly on his door.

Noah didn't make a sound.

They knocked again, louder this time.

Noah still made no sound.

He heard them say his name in a hoarse whisper.  The voice was vaguely feminine.

Noah still made no sound.  He closed his eyes and prayed to drift back to sleep.

They knocked again, louder. "Noah, please.  Open the door."

He stayed where he was.  "Stop.  I don't want to talk to anyone right now.  Leave me alone." he groaned, his own voice hoarse and dry with tears.

Noah heard the door knob clink almost inaudibly as the girl turned it and opened the door.  Then, again as she shut it.  He pulled his pillow over his head and sighed.

"Noah," the girl said. "It's Liria."

"I don't want you here." Noah whispered, his voice weak and rasped further by the pillow.

"Don't hide.  There's no hiding from grief or loss.  It will find you no matter what you do." she said.

Noah pressed the pillow down harder on his face.  "Leave, Liria....  Please." 

"I'm hurting too, Noah.  But, I know that it's possible to get through it.  That's why I'm here.  I came to you because I know I need you and I know you need me too.  We can do this together, Noah.  Just open up."  Tears choked her voice.

Hearing her choke up, Noah felt tears burn his own eyes.  He squeezed his eyes shut tightly.  

He heard her breaths start to shake.  Then, her hand slid into his, small and warm.  She squeezed his hand.  "Please, Noah...I...I need you."

A tear escaped his eye and his grip on the pillow tightened.

"Noah," Liria whispered. "Noah...please."

"Become a hero to your kind." Heimdall had told him.

Noah pulled the pillow off of his head and set it aside as he sat up.  His brown and white hair was a tangled mess.  He looked at Liria.  Her iridescent purple eyes were bright and puffy with tears, her nose tipped with red.  Her lips were parted as she breathed, making them look slightly more full.

 

Liria was a beautiful girl.  She had long white hair with black streaks that traveled all the way down her back.  Her face was all soft angles.  She was lithe and strong, curvy....

She had her hair unbound, hanging about her face.  She still wore what looked to be her pajamas; a purple and black sports bra and black running shorts.  She had several cuts and bruises sprinkled all over her that were healing okay.  

Noah didn't look any better with no shirt on, only a black and white pair of gym shorts.  Heimdall had had to stitch a few gashes in his leg, back,  and arms.  But, he'd done it well enough that the stitches weren't too ugly.

When Liria saw the tears on his cheeks, she fell into him and began to sob.  He shifted so that he sat with his legs out in front of him.  Liria slid down and curled up in his lap, sobbing.  Hesitantly, Noah rested his hand on her hair, stroking it ever so gently.  He felt so incredibly empty inside, his chest a cavity of pain.  Tears fell from his eyes, landing occasionally on Liria's arms and face.  Curled up in his lap, Liria seemed so small and fragile.  It was unbelievable.  

She was much like Marrah, almost a twin with how similar they were.  They were so powerful  and independent.  A war had torn down that wall of power that had built itself up inside of Liria.  It had torn her to pieces, leaving her like this, shaking and sobbing in his arms.

Liria eventually convinced Noah to go to the funerals after she'd composed herself enough to speak again.  

The two Nephilim separated for the brief time it took for them to dress for the funerals.  Noah put on a blue T-shirt and jeans.  Liria returned while he was washing his face.

"You're not gonna dress up a little?"  she asked from the doorway to the bathroom.

Noah grabbed the towel on a rack beside him, drying his face. "No." he replied. "Not for something I don't want to go to."

Liria had dressed up in a white sleeveless top with black leggings.  She was working on French braiding her long white hair as she spoke.  "Do it for Koda." she said.

Noah quirked his eyebrow at this.

"I know that you had feelings for her.  She looked kind of like Autumn and had a similar sort of spirit as her's."  

Noah stared at Liria, remembering how similar Koda was to Autumn.  A lump formed in his throat that he struggled to swallow. "Let's just get this over with."

Liria wrapped herself in her black wings and Transported herself to the funerals in the nearby cemetery.  Noah walked, in no hurry to see Koda's body burned or buried - depending on Lazerous' decision.  Either way, she'd be dead, wrapped in white silk and he'd never be ready to see that.  Not again.  

Aerie was eerily quiet, just as it had been during the funerals of the last war.  All the fallen and Nephilim that could make it to the funerals had gone.  It was just him, walking down the halls and stairs.  He walked all the way out to the front where he could just barely glimpse the glimmer of the protective veil around Aerie, making the world beyond shimmer.

Looking out at the world, Noah was struck with a sense of longing.  This was a world forever tarnished by the knowledge of the existence of so much more than just humans and all other normal creations in the world.  This was a world destroyed by the existence of demons, Hybrids, angels, Nephilim, fallen....  There was no hope of ever escaping this world that Noah lived in to live in the world just beyond Aerie's shimmering borders.  The knowledge of everything beyond human life would forever be in his head, forever preventing him from living a human life; marrying an amazing woman like Autumn and Koda had been, having a house and children, growing old, dying after having something of a full life....  None of that would ever be possible.  Not with wings on his back, angel blood in his veins.  Not with divine fire creating weapons from his mind.  Not with demons and Hybrids in the world.  

Noah allowed his white wings to unfold, stretching out wide before enfolding him in their soft down.  He paid no attention to the feeling of Transportation, keeping his mind on Koda.

The smell of death rose above the smoky scent of fire and ash when he had arrived in the cemetery.  Pulling back his wings, Noah saw the rows of pyres the fallen, angels, and Nephilim surrounded.  Only, no one's eyes were on the pyres or the bodies wrapped in white silk on top of them.  Their eyes were on the Death Angel that stood before the crowd and the bodies.  The service had not yet started. Everyone was still gathering, finding the people they felt most comfortable standing with to grieve and view the burning of their loved one's body or bodies.

Noah turned around to face the Death Angel.  He was the same one that had brought Koda's body back from the forest she'd been lost in.Only now, he wore formal mourning clothes for those of the Second World; a white jacket, white shirt, and black pants tucked into leather boots.  All made out of the tough gear material.  The white was very stark against the Death Angel's tanned skin and dark hair. 

"Fellow angels...Nephilim...fallen brothers." the angel whispered, moving to stand beside a large gravestone.

The words echoed around the graveyard, hushing whatever murmurs and sobs that could be heard.  Noah hadn't known that the Death Angels ever spoke.  He thought that all they ever did was take lives to the Lord.  Now, one spoke in front of countless angels and Nephilim.  

"The battle today was truly one of the worst Nephilim have had to face.  Many died.  I can still smell the death on each of you." the angel gazed into each face in front of him.  "I've never spoken at a death service for Nephilim before.  But, today...a human girl died.  One each of you were sworn to protect whether you knew it or not.  She was truly special.  One of the rare people with the curse of the Sight.  She fought for you and now she has given her life....  She gave it honorably, which is why her body shall be burned, not buried.  Her spirit - her essence - will be sent to the Lord so that, perhaps... in the next year or more, he might make another human like her for us to have fight at our side in this war that is never to be won."  

The Death Angel's eyes briefly rose to the clouds above.  "May we forever honor the death of Dakota." He bowed his head for a moment and stepped away from the stone he stood beside.  

The crowd remained silent as the fallen lit their torches and moved to stand beside the silk-wrapped bodies.

Noah took to the air to find the pyre that would bear Dakota's body so that he might see her one more time.  He soared just above the cemetary at a safe height, until he saw her beautiful face.  They'd made her up perfectly.  Her face set in a plain expression, her waves set in perfect curls on her shoulders, her eyes closed.  They'd leave the white silk coverings off of the faces of those who were to be burned so that the mourning can always hold the memory of their peaceful faces in their minds.  Those that would be buried would eventually be wrapped in the silk from head to toe before they were buried.  

Noah pulled his wings in a little and allowed himself to drop down beside her.  For a moment, he simply watched her, feeling the pain of her loss lodge under his ribs once more like a spike.  He reached out with a shaking hand and touched her hair, feeling its softness between his fingers once more.  A tear escaped his eye and he knew that he'd soon come to accept her loss.  Just not yet.

Five minutes later, Noah was asked to back away from Dakota's pyre so that her ascension may begin.  Noah bent down and pressed one last kiss to her forehead and backed away to stand with the other mourners to watch as the fallen lit each pyre one by one.  He tried to keep an eye on Koda's pyre as it burned, but he couldn't.  He couldn't watch.  Everyone else could watch their friends and siblings burn, but Noah had to turn away.