All The Stars In The Sky

Lay beside me...

And look up at all the stars in the sky

Let's forget about all the scars

Forget about how fast time can pass us by

Lay beside me...

And think about all the dreams floating in the sky

Think of about all the things we hope to come by

All the things we hope to see

Lay beside me...

And take me down your memory lane

Tell me all the memories that often run through your brain

Laugh and cry with me as I do the same to you

Lay with me in some peaceful place

Tell me all your dreams

Help me mend mine

For sometimes they seem to be coming apart at the seams

Lay with me quietly...

As I tell you how little I care for all the stars in the sky

But, I still hope they never die

Even as time passes us by

As you lay beside me dreaming your beautiful dreams

I remain awake

My eyes on all the stars in the sky

Watching as they burn like tiny matches

Laying beside you...

As you dream your beautiful dreams true

I look at all those stars in the sky

Watching as they roll by

All the while...

I think over my dreams

Wondering what happened to them

Wondering why it seems...they've become so empty

And I realize...

It's because I no longer care for all the stars in the sky

Why take all the stars to shine brightly in life...

When you can become one yourself?

Author's Note

First stanza came to me out of nowhere. No real inspiration, just...POOF! Wrote it out and did little editing. I don't really know what the point of it is or anything. It's just a piece. I figured I'd keep it and post it. It's different from my others soo... Hope you guys like it. :)

Reviews

[Lorry]

This is written in such a soft, wisp-like voice that the words seem to float into the sky like your dreams and ends like an epiphany that you/we/anyone can shine as bright as the stars as long as we are ready to put in the effort. The first and the penultimate stanzas are stand outs, but that takes nothing away from the rest, or overall power of the piece, just my personal opinion :)

[barleygirl]

You collected a number of oft-used images/concepts (stars, memories, dreams) which can lead to a forgettable message (so much said many times before), but your poem surprised the heck out of me becuz of how you put these images/concepts together in a fresh & original way, that's very relatable to real life & honest feelings. In stanza 1, I love using the words "stars" and "scars" together. Stanzas 3 & 4 remind me of doing this very thing with my best friend in the two years before he died. Then just when everything feels warm & fuzzy, stanza 5 interjects a surprising idea, that stars are actually meaningless to the narrator. I love the way it ties into the last stanza, where we find out the narrator is tired of being a spectator in his/her own life, & ready to be a star him/herself. Just when I thought this was going to be a passive love poem, then we are slapped with a meaningful inspirational ending. I like the way you've blended gentle expression with straightforward meaning here. No guessing at your meaning, which I prefer.

[Tessa Melendez]

Thank you so much. The best part about this poem is that it was one that flowed from my head. I didn't give it too much thought. I just wrote and touched it up a little bit when it came to rhyming.

[barleygirl]

I also love that feeling, when a poem seems to be writing itself & I'm just a spectator, as surprised as anyone at how it twists & turns!

[Tessa Melendez]

I love the feeling, but not always the outcome. Poems written in that way are annoying sometimes because, they come out half-poem, half-letter. It's horrible sometimes. :/

[barleygirl]

After years of practice, I think the goal is to capture the immediacy of that initial outpouring, but also doing a little pruning, a little word-crafting, but not to the point of ruining the spontaneity. I think that is the ultimate goal of writing for me.

[Tessa Melendez]

I totally get that.

[Marcus Sergiu David]

Wow. This might be one of my favorite poems now. The words flow really well. The 4th stanza is my favorite, I think. It actually wettened my eyes. Thank you for sharing this poem. :)

[Tessa Melendez]

I think I agree with you that stanza number 4 is quite good. I'm glad you enjoyed this piece. It just shows me that random inspirations can be quite powerful and amazing.

[Marcus Sergiu David]

I think that random inspiration is the strongest. Sure, a writer can find at least a grain of inspiration at any time, but when you're struck at random times, it is all easier to write and completely natural.

[Tessa Melendez]

Not always for me. I get like a stanza or a couple of lines and go off it.

[Marcus Sergiu David]

Well, a few lines is always what I personally start with, be it random or not.

[Inject Positivity]

So many thoughts... How gorgeously the imagery you have painted here, which seemed vivid... The beginning of the poem flows as the two hearts lay beside together, the Poet's heart follows her beloved's heart and how it roams with the natural beauty... The careful and Sweet love that the poet has inside her heart completely overwhelms the whole poem... The most important part of this write is its genuine emotions and passion... Once again hat's off to you...

Sincerely
Dhiman

[Tessa Melendez]

I never thought it was that great of a piece. None of those thoughts of yours crossed my mind. I just wrote from an image and the words that flowed through my head. But, I'm glad that you think this is a good piece. :) Thank you for your review.