Your touch so soft, you move so gentle, your eyes shine of beauty, your smile, make me happy. Those are only dreams, for what is real, is a nightmare. You make me cry, scream, hate, bleed, vomit. Will this never end? "God help me," My prayer bounce from wall to wall, more screams, hate, blood. "Why don't you die," 'bang, bang, bang,' blood drips from the wall. I close my eyes, in the middle of the night. Your touch so soft, you move so gentle, your eyes shine of beauty, your smile, make me happy. This time, I hope, it was real
I don't think this poem is good.. bleh! I just wanted to get a message out... People are tough, some aren't, but never will we ever really admit we want to be loved... Some children never get love from their parents, and that is so sad because it stays with them for the rest of their lives... I am fortunate to have love in my home... I need to shut up now :)
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Think you meant .. Your touch is soft .. and you move so gentle ..
Also .. My prayer bounce
from wall .. might be , My prayers bounce from wall to wall ..
your smile,
make me
happy. .. Maybe you meant .. Your smile makes me happy ?
I understand your words .. You just want REAL .. and happy ..
It is. but a lot of rage. Not a bad thing. Get it out.
But she who lives in your dreams will continue to until she has materialized into reality.
Faith.
have it.
If you need take it.
love is a gift to feel and it comes from inspiration not from obligation...unfortunately responsibility and tension weigh on people to focus on tension rather than seeing the power of love or lack of connection.
This is really well written. Your portrayal of love and how some people receive love that is pure while others only feel the pain of not having it....wishing, hoping to have it and for it to be real
few errors; still the message is clear. truely a stunning piece. don't underestimate yourself: this poem is really good. Great, even. Hell I enjoy most of your writing.
Love is a vile wicked thing sometimes, especially the unconditional kind. I know it sounds bitter but the depths of damage it can inflict upon a person when that person loves but isn't loved in return is devastating beyond measure. Its the continual acts of trying to gain approval, at least with children, to make someone or a parent love them...its heartbreaking what we are willing to endure all for the sake of love and to be loved in return.
With a bit of tweaking here and there this poem can be quite powerful, especially with the message.
Think you meant .. Your touch is soft .. and you move so gentle ..
Also .. My prayer bounce
from wall .. might be , My prayers bounce from wall to wall ..
your smile,
make me
happy. .. Maybe you meant .. Your smile makes me happy ?
I understand your words .. You just want REAL .. and happy ..