Socrates, the Professor Cat

Socrates, the professor cat,

Loves to teach and lecture.

Whether he gets his point across

Is sometimes merely conjecture.

 

When left alone for a period of time,

He'll meet you at the front door

Where he will greet you on your return

And also give you what for.

 

"Excuse me," he says in his feline way,

"But you would be obtuse

If you failed to see that your actions

Border on cat abuse.

 

"Yes, we're independent, BUT

Frankly, my dear, you seem

To want to exploit our autonomy

By taking it to the extreme."

 

He lectures for quite a while, for he

Wants you to do your best

When the time approaches for you

To take another test.

 

"You know we value promptness," he adds,

"And I don't mean to be rude,

But when our dinner is not on time,

We're NOT in a very good mood.

 

"Research, you know, is vital and your

Failure to study impedes

A total understanding of what

Constitutes our needs."

 

He constantly tries to teach you patience

And thinks your dedication

To knowing his mind for both of you

Is a win-win situation.

 

If you misplace something, such as

Your watch, your keys, or a ring,

He'll stare at you as if to say,

"Oh, you poor, poor thing."

 

When you're frazzled, his calm demeanor

Implies that you at least

Would benefit from the study of ancient

Wisdom of the East.

 

He likes to observe from afar as you

Go about your activities,

Ever watchful to see if you are

Developing harmful proclivities.

 

At other times he just sits back

To see how much you've learned

And tries to silently calculate

How much praise you've earned.

 

If he desires a tasty treat

And thinks that you're withholding

Something from him, you'd better watch out:

You'll be getting a scolding.

 

Admonishingly, he says, "Do NOT

Think my methods nefarious,

It's just that learning broadens your being.

Take it from THIS Sagittarius."

 

You think you're one step ahead of him--

At least so you assume.

But Socrates will let you know

Who is teaching whom.

 

-by Bob B (2-16-20)

Reviews

[Katrina Mckeown]

Very entertaining read, love your sense of humour, which shines through every poetry line here written. You do describe or feline friends purrfectly! I one had a cat named Ollie and boy was he clever , he used to wait on me outside shops etc and follow me home practically meowing all the way almost like saying you better have treats for me lol this brought back some good memories and gave me a chuckle. Brilliant

[AJNJ]

Can you lend me Socrates? I want such a cat to be active around here. I’ll train it to catch many things including the mice scurrying around locally. I like your cat poems much. Good entertainment.