We'd Like You to Join Our Amazing Group

"We’d like you to join our amazing group.

Though some might call us a cult, we're not.

We don't resort to brainwashing. No,

We don't try to control each thought.

 

"We just teach you the right way to think;

We teach you how to "choose" your words,

How to act, and how to feel.

Critical thinking is for the birds.

 

"Therefore, you won't have to wonder

What is right and what is wrong here.

Since questioning, doubting, and dissenting confuse you,

Let's just say that they don't belong here.

 

"Our way, you will find, is the ONLY path

To free you from a world of grief.

Once you cut ties with non-believers,

Your zealous commitment will give you relief.

 

"People out there curse and belittle us.

That doesn’t faze us, for they don’t see

That we are right and they are lost.

It’s all so clear. Don’t you agree?

 

"The blessed teachings that we employ

Have nothing at all to do with guilt.

Instead, we call it 'forming your conscience.'

Obey and we’ll back you to the hilt.

 

"Fear is a focus for cults out there.

Their tactics frighten, coerce, and demean.

With us you will find safety and security--

If you can prove that you can come clean.

 

"If your friends and family don't join you,

Don't worry: you've got family with us.

To hell with the others; you don't need them.

Lamenting their loss is not worth the fuss.

 

"Imagine how much honor you'll have

Recruiting new members to join our community.

You'll jump at the chance to share your path

To salvation at every opportunity.

 

"Your total allegiance, of course, is expected.

We can't imagine you'd try to deceive us.

One thing we can guarantee:

You'll never--EVER--want to leave us."

(3-30-15)