Peeved

What's worse than a bad Habit?

Tim Buckley

Copyright © 2013

PEEVED

 

 

            I first noticed my peeve about a year ago, while returning the Habit I had purchased the day before; the Habit had gone bad, and I wanted my money back.  Then, there�"in a cage next to the Quirks�"was the cutest baby Peeve I had ever seen:  Furry as a Star Trek Tribble, large “Precious Moments” eyes.  A personal pet Peeve…I had to have him!

            Once home, my Peeve proved personal by chewing his toe nails at the dinner table. I hate that! Also, he blows his nose in the tub while taking a shower.  I hate that even more.  Furthermore, he never covers his mouth when sneezing, and won’t return what he borrows. I triple hate that!  To top it off, he picks his nose on double dates, then chews slowly. That scene forced me throw out my raw oysters.  (I suspect he was too close to a habit cage, and one rubbed off on him.)

            Peeve thinks he’s funny, but his jokes are worse than those on the weather channel.  Included in them are more clichés than Andy Griffith uses at a church social.  And practical jokes?  Itching powder on the toilet seat before my (ex) girlfriend sat down.  Hilarious.  (He’s getting harder to control; I’d better be careful or he’ll rule me.)

            Cool?  No, but he blasts blasted rap music trying to be.  Furthermore, he thinks he’s so hot! He wears sunglasses indoors, and puts on more cologne than a skunk cabbage has scent.  But he’s really smart.  Fact is, he knows more than I.  To display it, he never listens to a thing I say.  (He’s worse than the pet pip-squeak I once had who thought he was Mr. Big.) Well, this is still going on.  Trouble is, peeves multiply faster than habits, so now I have many peeves.  Since my friends hate my peeves, too, I am absolutely alone now.  Alone, that is, but for my peeves.

                     

 

 

 

Reviews

[Marie]

T.B., I had all but given up on you. Still I checked your work every day. Now I find that you've adopted a peeve, and from it gained many peeves. I only hope they don't stop you from writing.