A Sap's Fables

When I get a thought that won't make a story, I write it under the title, "A Sap's Fables." are a few, and I have many more. Remember, I said they are a SAP'S ideas, not a genius'!

A SAP’S FABLES

Tim Buckley

©2013

 

·         A giant hand coming from the sky, whacking a Catholic kid on the head with a ruler. Other kid seeing this is thinking, “Wow! God really IS Catholic!”

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·         The Pope sitting on a park bench, tearing papers, smiling & tossing papers into the air. He’s singing, “95 theses tacked on the wall, 95thesis on wall, take one down rip it around, 94 theses  now on wall. Caption: The Pope’s rendition of Luther’s “95 Thesis on the wall”.

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·         Sign on Psychiatrist’s door. It says, “Self Validation:$300.00 hour

                             Parking Validation: Free”

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·         A toddler in a high chair. A giant pile of spit food is on tray, and kid is scolding his food, “Bad carrots, bad, bad peas!” Caption: This kid will grow up to teat life the same as he does food: Spit it up and Chew it out.

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·         Little girl telling a man in a wheelchair, “Sorry, Daddy, but I have a math test to study for.”

Caption: Larry Flint’s daughter gets out of “Take your daughter to work day.”

 

·         A few guys on benches in front of door labeled “Woman Scorned Dept.”

Caption: Where tough guys in hell are sent to be broken.

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·         An “Angel of Death” eating breakfast: Life Cereal

 

·         A zombie reading a book to a 6^th grade class. Behind him the principal is yelling at teacher, “I don’t care if he does have a Masters in literature…Dead Men tell no tales!”

 

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·         Three girls lying on the beach tanning. Behind them a giant can of beans is walking out of the water towards them, hands stretched in front of him to strangle girls. Caption: “Creature from the Black Legume.”

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·         A turkey sitting on table in doctor’s office. Doc is telling turkey, “Well, the good news, Tom, is that the lump on your shoulder is not cancer. The bad news is, it’s a pop-up thermometer and you are almost done.”

 

 

Reviews

[Marie]

Very clever. Expanded a bit, some of these would make nice drabbles.