Sonnet on Sleep (revised)

Sleep is great.

Oh dear light, won’t you please let my eyes go!

I must again visit my long gone friend,

Who waits for me at night, however slow.

Let me be, and then my mind onward send,

My sleepy soul to that heavenly place,

Full of things like dreams, magic, and good rest.

And when departed at once do embrace

My thoughts that are here as a gentle guest.

But if you decide to be evil now,

Open my eyes from the nightmare, oh please!

I will wake in sweat and wonder just how

My pleasantness you did so quickly seize.

The realm of dreams is faintly light and pure,

But full of crushing darkness, I am sure.

Author's Note

My revised version of the "Sonnet on Sleep". All criticisms welcome!

Reviews

[Gleb Zavlanov]

Another wonderful poem! Bravo!

[Diana]

It must have been challenging to get the meter right! Kudos.

[Trevor Jay Bloodworth]

It was, actually. Took me a little while, with a lot of revisions.

[Ravyne Hawke]

Wonderful Sonnet, Trevor. Beginning with the need of sleep, ending with the need of dreams. I like the twist there. Good job.

[NA]

Interesting read...most enjoyable :) x

[poetdoug]

I like it. Good work. I think I will read it tonight before going to bed. It should help!
Seriously, I like its rhythm and flow.

[shallimarRose]

I really enjoyed this one Trevor.. It confused me and I love that lol... It starts out asking the light to let you go insinuating you need to sleep but ends up asking the dream to let you wake up.. Very interesting twist. I love it.. shallimarRose ...

[The Verse: A Poetry Jou..]

I like the turn in this one.

[Trevor Jay Bloodworth]

Thank you very much! You're reviews are always welcome and considered highly.

[Sam]

Very Very nicely done. I love the intensity it adds to parts and softness to others. The contrast is amazing. No criticisms here my friend. Great job.

[Trevor Jay Bloodworth]

Thank you very much! It really didn't take me long to revise it. I just had to get the meter JUST right on a few parts.

[Sam]

But you were able to locate the exact part and sometimes that is really difficult because if you revise the wrong part you could lose the whole poem. So kudos to you.

[Trevor Jay Bloodworth]

Hahah. Again, thank you very much.