Friendly Advice

We thought of ourselves as creation's bright crown

but we're up on a ledge and we won't be talked down

so it's come the time when the thoughts of a man

had better concern his retirement plan

so count up the meals to your final hour

and the clothing you'll need in the woods with no power

and also some guns and a whetstone and knife

and ten shells a day for the rest of your life.

If you don't have the money don't just haw and hem;

hook your pickup and chain to the bank's ATM

and pack up the money and take it someplace

where tasty canned food can be bought by the case,

then head to the woods and dig like a mole

and pack off the dirt so they can't find your hole

and hide all your brand new possessions within

and go back to working and try not to grin.