Seasons Change

Definitely not my best. Something I wrote about myself in the third person at the end of the last school year. It sort of unravels at the end but I think it adds an unexpected element

Drew could never find the joy in long distance running. It was slow going and painful, and frankly she didn’t have the mental strength to endure the long workouts that the other kids seemed to complete with ease. She wasn’t built like a cross country runner either. Her legs weren’t sticks with knees like door knobs and her feet weren’t arched high with a natural aptitude for agility. Her thighs rubbed together as she ran and her flat footsteps could barely carry her up to the top of Via las Cumbres. And when she got there she was always gasping for air as if she had been drowning; her tonsils were enormous and hardly let any air escape down her throat into her all too unforgiving lungs.Twelve weeks of fall. She made it through twelves weeks of a fiery hell, and she was never looking back.

Drew had always been an unusual girl, and after a summer of numbness she craved impulse. She became scattered. Sporadic. In the previous year, she had spent months wishing for a boy’s attention without general success, but when he took her to homecoming she left through the backdoor running barefooted to the other side of school only to sit and eat nutella for two hours before returning. She climbed on top of school buses wet from the rain because yellow was her favorite color. She ignored her friends for weeks with little explanation. She read books inside of washing machines and set a shoe on fire. For Drew, the fall was a period of time that lacked thought, emotion, and better yet, a sense of mental stability. Nonetheless, she longed for that time when at least her emptiness could give her a false sense of joy.

Sooner or later, December 21 rolled around and Drew was really glad the world didn’t end because there was still someone she hadn’t formally met. She talked to him all the time, on the phone, texting, or messaging, and after she got back from Arizona they were finally going to hang out, on the very first day of the new year. Soccer season had begun, and Drew was enjoying every minute of it. Something about her lit up when it was just her, the turf, and the ball at her feet. It didn’t matter how much anyone else thought she sucked, it couldn’t make her love the game any less. She came to practice and laughed the day away in the comfort of her friends, and things couldn’t seem to get any better. The boys and girls soccer teams both went to Arizona for a tournament over Christmas break. They played games, then would come back to chill at the hotel later at night. Drew was very close to many of the boys on the team, and was often teased when people assumed she liked one of them. It was nothing new, but the day after Drew returned from the trip she was thinking and realized she had developed some feelings for one in particular and she wanted to punch herself in the face. But that is a story for another time.

After the end of soccer season, and the end of something else, Drew ran track. She loved short and middle distance. She was fast. She was passionate. She felt like she was running away from all her problems, and unlike in cross country, they couldn’t catch her. One day she let anxiety eat her up, and the next she left it in the dust. Drew realized she was growing smaller and smaller by the second, while the universe only continued to expand. If you put a magnifying glass over her, you still could not see her. She couldn’t afford to shrink anymore by dwelling on such diminutive problems. There was no one to hate, there was no one to blame, there was no reason to be ashamed of herself. Life is beautiful, life is a gift, life is but a dream. So look at the people around you, look at them laughing, look at how lucky you are to know them and to be in this moment and goddammit this sounds like utter bullshit, but god I don’t know, I just love my friends and my family and everything’s going to be alright. It really is. God this is bullshit. Okay the end.

Reviews

[Baban.A.A]

well when I usually read I angle it as I want. first it was short and well written in many ways, you have used the first person perspective or method which sounded like you were Drew which was good since you expressed her in the way you articulate yourself, but I believe it was much of you than her, you controlled her and did not let her speak for herself, i don't blame it , but you closed your mind across her.

the absence of movability and change were essential in this story, right you approached repition in a diffrent way, still there were parts needed to be more explianed, some needed to be abridged. all in all it was good and I liked it well done

[Taylor Salmons]

thank you! A appreciate the feedback!!

[Firestone Feinberg]

I liked reading the story. It is well-written and, thank God, not too long. The end where you become yourself shines with surprise and creativity, --david

[Taylor Salmons]

Thanks so much!! I really loved getting this review, it means a lot thank you again!