House 192

The prologue from my current project 'House 192'.

The emptiness of the house was so thick she could feel it. Her heavy boots were all that broke the silence. As she walked down to the hall towards the lounge room she could sense the death that floated amongst her. Beams of light burst through small openings in the curtains. She watched the dust move around in the air, inhaling it. The house moaned, but she didn’t flinch. There was nothing to be scared of. Not anymore. Not now.
Her right foot took another step, bringing a thud to the floor. Her skin was crusted with dry blood and her hair was tangled together in sweat. Her ankle throbbing, head bleeding and eye swollen. She continued to limp towards the door and as she approached it and turned the handle the silence remained. She exited the house and walked out. Outside was almost as quiet aside from the occasional bird and gust of wind making its way through the surrounding bushes. Her eyes were still trying to focus and adapt to the light. After another few moments she spotted her blue Subaru parked where she had left it. She felt through the pockets in her jeans and found that her car keys were still there. There was a crunching noise every time she took a step as her boots landed on the dried up autumn leaves lying on the ground below her feet. She made it to the car but before opening the door she turned around, facing the house. She looked at it intently and put her right hand to her forehead, blocking the sun from her eyes. The white wooden panels looked clean, perhaps freshly painted, the front decking polished and looked as though it had just been swept, free of leaves and grime. On the front door sat the number 192, just below a peephole. It made her feel uneasy. She felt like the house was looking back at her, laughing at her. It knew what had happened. It seemed crazy to her because this house looked perfectly normal. Any other person would look at this house and wouldn’t have any idea what had happened behind these walls, doors and windows. No one could imagine what this house knew. But she did. She knew what happened.
She sucked deep into her throat before spitting towards the house and cursing. With her left hand she opened the door, grabbed the keys from her pocket and put it in the ignition. Once the car had started she put it into gear and pressed down on the accelerator, the wheels began spinning and leaves spat up from the ground then slowly floated back down to the dirt. The car was moving and she spun the steering wheel. She was driving away. She looked into the rearview mirror and took one last look at the house. Looking back at all the windows gave her that uneasy feeling again. The house knew what she’d done and it was laughing. She made it to the end of the driveway and before she turned left onto the street she felt like she was being watched. She shook away the feeling and turned the steering wheel and lightly tapped the accelerator, turning out of the drive.
As her car left the property, he watched her from the top story window. His eyes burned into the Subaru, fists tightened and lips curled back.

Author's Note

I haven't fully revised, so please ignore grammar/spelling issues. Please let me know what your thoughts are though, thank you.

Reviews

[Breanna O'Brien]

This is a very interesting start. It has a lot of potential so far, and just the right amount of mystery to keep the reader hooked. The pacing is great, the only thing I would suggest is maybe break up the paragraphs a little more so it isn't just a huge wall of text. I am very intrigued though. Great job!

[Taylapaige Nugent]

Thanks so much! I'm very glad you've enjoyed it.
Thank you for the tips as well, it really helps :)