Limbo

I change my chant to an enlightend tone,

You see the smile, you are welcomed home,

 

I greet you near this delightful view,

Situational embrace of solid truths,

 

Happy to see you the delight is mine,

I'm shocked in aw when you walk right by,

 

I turn around and the picture is clear,

I'm still gone and your still not here..

Reviews

[Awdures]

Heartwrenching. So near but yet so out of reach. Good write!

[Bridget Mcmaken]

wow awesome work. I love it.

[Leah Everett]

Actually, I love this, because I can pretty much relate to it. Powefully written and full of clarity. Excellent!!

[Richard Williams]

Succinct and elegantly powerful. Just fix the "aw" and in the last line, the "your" (should be "you're"). Some excellent lines here; "Situational embrace of solid truths" is a foundation for a graceful edifice of expression with a expansive skylight engaging a rainbow.

[KL]

Enlightend = enlightened; aw = awe, your = you're. Other than that, I thought this was fantastic! My favourite poem by you so far - the last line really brings it all together. Being in limbo can really f**k you with, hey?

[Gracie-San]

This was very well written! It has a few typos, but Sara Mercury pointed them all out! The rhyme scheme flowed very well and the ending was absolutely great.

Good job!

[Addie]

Very short but full of emotion. I like it. =)

[Sara Mercury]

I would have put a semi-colon between the phrase as such, "happy to see you; the delight is mine." Also, "aw" should be, "awe." Additionally, "your" should be, "you're" (as it is supposed to be a contraction for the words, "you are"). And finally, the word, "enlightend" should be, "enlightened." Other than that, it was very well written. I loved the ending, most especially!

[Love Is Dead]

this was amazing!! really im not kiddin

i really loved these lines:

"I turn around and the picture is clear,

I'm still gone and your still not here.."

[Cristal Bridges]

I remember the picture used for your poem in a Hanz Hozler book. That's Mary Lincoln if I'm not mistaken grandaughter or something like that of Abe Lincoln and that's the ghost of Honest Abe behind her. :) Anyway, on to your poem. . .

I like this a lot it's short but absolutely lovely and startling all at the same time. A really great poem. You are a talented writer.