MAYBE ALL WE WANT IS A GOOD TIME!

MY POINT OF VIEW ON SINGLE MOTHERS AND DATING!

Maybe all we want is good time!

By Tamyara Brown

 

 

 

I am a single mother with six children and a grandson at the age of thirty four. I am stereotype the minute I say six children. The first question I get is, " how many baby daddies do you have?" When I reply, " only one." They then ask, " Well, those kids must of drove him crazy . Well you shouldn't  of left/ or let him go  it's almost impossible for you to get a man to raise someone else kids." I can't tell you how many times I have heard that. I am a single black woman with a large family. Does that make me less of a woman because  I have a lot of children? Does that make me less desirable? Does that say that I am  not as sexy as a single woman?I ask these question not only for myself but for any woman ready to date and have a good time.

The minute a man may find us attractive and even find us to be someone they can have a good time with. The minute you say, " I have a lot of  children." That gentleman runs like roaches when the light is turn on. I 'm not at all trying to say that all men are like that or that men haven't got into a relationship with a woman with children. This isn't something only men say but so many females have said, " Girl, you can't get a date with him because you have  too many children." I had one female  go as far as saying, " You'd block his blessings, your not his type. No man wants a woman with all those babies."  It has made me fearful of dating, not because of rejection but because for once I would like some gentleman to see me as woman who just wants to enjoy his company.

I would like for a man to see  that I am just as great as a single woman. I'm not looking for a daddy for my kids nor am I concerned with what is in his wallet. Just maybe I too have money to sustain my famiy. It doesn't mean that I am looking for you to support me. All I ever want is to enjoy your company.

I would like to go out and enjoy a man's company. I am parent twenty four hours a day.  So it's okay to ask me out on a date without thinking there is a motive behind just wanting to have a good time. Everything isn't about the expense of the date or where. Let's face it going to the park and eating a hot dog and general adult conversation is fine for me.

Another thing I've learned is that I'm not alone. In a survey taken by essence magazine a whopping 68% of men state they would not  date a woman with children. I didn't say marry or be in a serious relationship I said go on a simple date.

I guess this is my form of venting not only for myself but single mothers everywhere who work hard and sacrifice. We put in so much energy into our children that yes I do believe we deserve to have a good time with the opposite sex. 

My point is that not every woman wants whats in your wallet, nor do we want to rush you into marriage and make you a instant daddy. We want  your friendship a dinner that maybe we'll split the bill. 

We want to enjoy a few hours or hell maybe even  sixty minutes of your time. Alot of times we as woman have made it hard for a man to not see us as having a major plan for a guy. I can admit that but also say that we need to not put a label on mothers that no one may want us all because we have children.

 

Author's Note

first draft!!

Reviews

[luke312]

Labeling and thinking that's what a person really is not righteous act. mothers are the back bone of society and sometimes they need a little love too or may be just some fun.