TORTURE IN A CONFERENCE ROOM

Parables

Idioms

Sayings

Boring sermon

Words! Words! Words!

The illiterate in me screamed in frustration

“If you have something to say to us, just say it already!”

I didn’t see the point of all these long meetings

The air was hot

The windows were shut

The air-conditioning system was broken

The conference room was stuffy

My colleagues were yawning

Most were battling with perspiration

Others were biting their already harvested fingernails

The speaker was relentless

He just kept going on and on and on

Unaware of what his lecture was doing to them

He was committed to his speech

Intoxicated by his own words

Bathing them with his steady spray of saliva

“Could someone make it stop please!”

“Could someone zip “its” mouth and tie “it” to a chair?”

Something should be done about his rattling

Something should be done soon!

Else I was sure someone would go crazy

His shriek voice was now getting increasingly frustrating

He even laughed at his own dry jokes

They just kept staring

Patiently waiting for when those lips would stop moving

This was no longer a regular meeting

It was now a gathering for torture

The long speech

The boring talk

The dry jokes were enough to make one commit suicide

Ok maybe not suicide per se…hehehe

But I was daydreaming about tossing a chair at the lecturer

And every time he laughed at his dry jokes

I was tempted to throw my pen into his mouth

The sight of him choking on a pen would be so hilarious

I was certain that everyone who was asleep would wake up to laugh at the drama

At this point I decided to end this torture

I had practiced this at home

So I was certain it would work

I gently moved my laptop away from me

Adjusted my neck tie

Rolled my eyes until all I could see was a blurred haze

And then I started jerking until I fell flat on the cold floor

By Sylvia Chika

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Reviews

[Shivam Murari]

Such a beautiful description of real-life morphed in the form of a conference room! :)