Insta-Twit-Face Blues

The sheep look down

Well I  met me a girl

at the local coffee shop

At least I think I met her

'cause she wouldn't stop

tippity tap tappin'

on her fancy new Iphone

like talkin' to a ghost

while your sittin' all alone

Insta-twit-face blues

The insta-twit-face blues

She was chatting to someone in Ireland

While I was trying to schmooze

Well we started dating

I think she called it that

I had better conversations

with her half deaf sleeping cat

I'd cook her gourmet dinners

A true sight to behold

Then she'd start snapping a bunch of pictures 

and the meal would get all cold

Insta-twit-face blues

The insta-twit-face blues

my grub was good on snapchat

but wasn't something she'd chew

She was getting so frustrated

'cause I wasn't with the times

I wondered when reality

had started becoming such a crime

While I stated my observations

She chatted with her friends

I guess I knew at that point

It was the beginning of the end

Insta-twit-face blues

The insta-twit-face blues

she started givin' me the stinkeye

Cause she didn't like my views

She copy pasted from a website

a fill in the blanks "Dear John"

She said she tried to text me

but my phone, it wasn't on

I figured "what the hell"

My cover was about to be blown

That's when I told her

I never did have a phone

Insta-twit-face blues

The insta-twit-face blues

I'm technologically deficient

But at least I'm enjoying the views

Reviews

[barleygirl]

THE BEST SPOOF I've read in months!!! I can spin a sassy rhyme, but here you've blown me out of the water many times over. This is so peppy & bouncy, as if showing us how this narrator is an eager puppy wanting some attention, in contrast to this boring situation he's stuck with. You weave in great lingo & pertinent observations about this widespread problem. The title totally slays with imagination & humor. Also, this is one of the rare times when a poem is written in song format & it really does FEEL like a song! (((HUGS))) fondly, Margie

[Misterr Remeat]

I do contract work sometimes in a big coffee chain and often see groups of people sitting at the same table not conversing, just staring into phones or laptops, occasionally showing each other something funny. I thought I'd poke some fun at that. Hugs back at ya!

[barleygirl]

You really nailed it! I could feel the narrator not being OF this world, somewhat separate, as if watching . . .

[emipoemi]

Apart from some minor musicality issues with certain lines and Verse 4 Line 4 having stronger power were it to go: "But my phone was never on", this is brilliant! Very funny, witty, and smart, and I very much enjoyed it. Tweak the musically iffy lines, and you got yourself a gem. Well done!

[John Rick]

Haha yesssss! I could picture it all in my head! I find this hilarious but true. Some people nowadays are more focused not just on their phones, but very much on social media that they've forgotten what's like without it. The "Dear John" part is my favorite. Great work!

[Jonathon Coleman]

I love this. Very timely indeed. You would see this as typical for millennials. It's sad but it's true. - Chris of junk hauling

[Chris Shaw]

Humorous and refreshing. Great write.

Chris

[Lorry]

***warning. Oncoming rant***
Well, what can I say about these mutants that hasn't been said before? Bloody plenty as it turns out. I rarely even acknowledge them anymore, but I find it funny when one of them does deem you worthy of a brief glance, to only speak in text talk. Like saying NELI with a straight face when they expect a lol (not even laughing inwardly), orROFLYSSMTT (rolling on floor laughing, yet somehow still managing to type) if they send a text.
I also have a 3 text rule, that if it cant be said in three texts, the third reply will be "you bore me" and then send no more. It drives them mental. Well, more than normal for someone who doesnt lift their eyes off their screen while crossing the road. Its probably just natural selection at work, but in my opinion, the gene pool needs more chlorine. :)
Ahh, I feel much better now, thanks :)

[Misterr Remeat]

Well said!

[AYVID N]

An engagingly humorous take on the situation much on ground today. The love for the virtual has certainly put paid to real relationships. It’s the instant kind of world we live in now. Gratification on fingertips! I love this read!

[Misterr Remeat]

Thanks! I was sitting at a Subway having lunch one fine afternoon and watched a girl walk in to a sign while texting. She only hurt her pride thank god. It did get me thinking though.

[AYVID N]

I’ve missed a few steps myself. Indeed, it’s something we must think about. You’re welcome :)