Chapter 2 - Introductions! Yay!

Chapter 2
Introductions! Yay!

“AAAHHHH!” shrieked the salad bowl, voice old and hoarse. A voice definitely not meant for screaming.

“AAAAAHH!” cried Sydney, full of panic.

“AAAHHHH!”

“AAHH---!”

“Will you stop with all that screaming? It’s hurting my ears!” Ruthantasis shouted over both of them, and everyone went silent. Sydney stared at the salad bowl, and it stared back at her. Beside her, Ruthantasis let out a tired sigh. “Thank you!” He turned to face Sydney, who was still blinking at the alive salad bowl in disbelief. “Now, could you send me back to my camp? I was just about to eat a sugar cube when pop!, I was suddenly lounging on a statue of bones.” He huffed, irritated. “It is not a good start to my day!”

Sydney turned to look at the sandwich, then back at the salad bowl, glancing between them a couple more times until she finally realised: “Oh my gosh. There’s two of you?”

“HA?!” both talking Foods shouted, turning abruptly to face Sydney. She shrank under their gazes.

“Me and…” The salad bowl scoffed and pointed at the sandwich, a disgusted look on his face. “Him?”

“Oh, great. Thanks a lot,” Ruthantasis said, rolling his eyes. Then, he did a slit across his throat and whispered to Sydney, “We are not the same!”

Sydney swallowed hard. The salad bowl took a dignified step forward and regarded the sandwich with his fork.

“He’s homeless!” The salad bowl cried. Sydney could feel fury bubbling in the sandwich’s veins. Still, Ruthantasis managed to control it…only slightly.

“And you’re that awful salad bowl from the elder’s club!” He exploded.

“I have a name!” said the salad bowl.

“I can’t care enough to know it.” Ruthantasis crossed his arms.

“It’s Krale, you lowly, disrespectful---”

“OKAY!” Sydney pulled the two talking Foods apart, as far away from each other as possible. The salad bowl struggled against her hand while the sandwich stayed put, too done with everything to care. Sydney eyed both of them warily. “Calm down first,” she told them, “Krale and…Ruth.”

Was it her fault the sandwich’s name just wouldn’t commit itself to her memory? It was way too long, and her brain couldn’t take in any more information today. This is the real definition of a fried brain, Sydney thought as she released both Foods from her grip. Krale, the salad bowl, immediately slammed his fork-staff on the floor.

“You will not get away with your rude---AH!” Suddenly, his knees buckled and Krale face-planted onto the floor. “My knees!” he cried, then cursed, “I hate being old!”

Sydney didn’t know how to react to that. Should she help him up onto a chair? She was great at care-taking old people---she lived with her grandparents.

“Why should I be kind to a bunch of old Foods who only sit and judge others all day? You and your club aren’t better than everyone else,” Ruth said, “It’s pathetic.”

“Oookay,” Sydney started to say, “...that’s kind of harsh.”

“The elder’s club is to be respected!” Krale sputtered with rage, then continued in a condescending tone, “I’m not the pathetic one here. I’m not the one living on the streets, rummaging around for sugar cubes all day!”

“I---!”

“That’s ENOUGH!” Sydney shouted, surprising even herself as the whole room fell silent. Both talking Foods were wide-eyed and tight-lipped, staring at her in shock. Suddenly, Sydney was at a loss for words, and her cheeks pricked with heat.

“Um…” Sydney’s gaze darted from Ruth to Krale, and she finally settled on saying, “Apologise to each other. Now.”

Ruthantasis glanced awkwardly at Krale, then raised an incredulous eyebrow at Sydney, as if asking her if she was being for real right now. Sydney shot him a glare, trying to hide how scared she was under a mask of fury.

“I’m not apologising to a nobody like him!” Krale huffed, chin up high. Ruthantasis groaned.

“If he’s not apologising, then I’m not, either.”

Sydney crossed her arms and her eyes blazed with rage. These two were insufferable! Why couldn’t they just work it out calmly? They were like a bunch of elementary school kids! Her mind wandered back to when Ms Bluebelle had said she wasn’t paid enough for this, and Sydney agreed. She wasn’t paid enough for this, either. Except, she wasn’t being paid at all, which made it ten times worse. Her mouth was beginning to twitch in barely suppressed anger, and the two talking Foods could see that, too. It was as if their two tiny Food-brains had finally begun working, and the two began apologising to one another, sneaking occasional glances at Sydney who was now beginning to calm down. After Ruth and Krale were all out of apologies, Sydney nodded her head in approval.

“Good,” she said, “Ruth and Krale, since you both already know each other so well…” Sydney shot them both a glare. They winced. “Let’s start with me. My name is Sydney Cohen.”

Okay, introductions, Sydney thought to herself. I’ve been prepared for introductions since first grade. She was glad there was still something normal she could hold onto right now, even if it was something as basic as an introduction. She was constantly losing her footing today, and if she lost it again, she was considering cancelling the whole month and going straight back home.

Sydney cleared her throat and said, “A fun fact about me is that everyone in the school calls me Chromie---short for heterochromia---a condition for my two-coloured eyes.” She now pointed at her blue-green eyes. Surprisingly, Ruthantasis and Krale were both listening intently. Sydney tried to hide her triumphant grin as she continued, “It’s a family thing. Even my cat has it. I personally think it’s pretty nice.” Sydney smiled. She was grateful the kids in her school never made fun of her for it. She didn’t have to suffer like those unfortunate kids in the movies. She was lucky they thought it was cool---that they thought she was cool---because it made her appreciate this mis-matched eyes of hers very much.

Sydney looked expectantly at Ruthantasis, gesturing for him to speak. “Now it’s your turn,” she said.

“Me?” Ruthantasis asked, uncertain.

Sydney nodded. “Introduce yourself.”

Ruthantasis nodded unsurely. “Right…so…my name is Ruthantasis. A fun fact about me---that I’m sure you already know---is that I’m homeless. Yay.”

There was a moment of silence before Sydney decided to ask. “Is that all?”

Ruthantasis raised his eyebrows. “Are you not going to ask why?”

Sydney shrugged. “You could tell me, but I wouldn’t dream of prying.”

Ruthantasis’s eyes went wide, then he retreated back into his thoughts, a hand on his chin as he tried to think of another fun fact for Sydney.

“On top of being homeless, I’m also an orphan…?” His voice went all high in the end, as if it was a question instead of a statement. He looked up at Sydney like she was a teacher evaluating his answer, and when Sydney cocked her head to one side, Ruthantasis gave up on introductions all together. He sighed, throwing his jelly hands down in defeat. “Yeah, that’s pretty much the most interesting thing about me.”

“Oh,” Sydney said without thinking.

“I’m a disappointment, I know.” Ruthantasis let out another tired sigh.

“No! That’s not what I meant---”

Ruthantasis waved her off and Sydney clammed up. “It doesn’t matter what you meant. I simply cannot care less,” he said, brushing bread crumbs off of himself. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to find my way home without anyone’s help. I would greatly appreciate it, too, if the both of you forget we ever had this conversation. Good day.”

Just like that, Ruthantasis started walking away on his jelly legs, but since they were so short, the whole situation was kind of…anticlimactic. A couple seconds of jelly feet squelching and Ruthantasis’s curses under his breath later, Krale stepped up. He closed his eyes tight in concentration, held two stem fingers up in the air (he only had three to begin with), and licked his lips. A moment later, his eyes flew open in shock, and he had to lean on his fork-staff for support. Sydney was beginning to think that the fork was more of a cane than a magical staff. Ruthantasis was still less than a metre away when the old salad bowl howled in agony, sinking to his knees.

“We’re no longer on Geveodu!” Krale declared, on the verge of tears.

Ruthantasis stopped short in his tracks. Krale gasped at his own declaration, and under different circumstances, Sydney would’ve thought it quite funny. But, the poor salad bowl was having a mental breakdown, and right now, Sydney was too confused to comprehend pretty much anything and everything to laugh.

“What do you mean?” Ruthantasis said suspiciously.

“What’s Geveodu?” Sydney asked, making both Foods gasp in shock.

“There’s no way you’re still keeping up with this ‘I’m-dumb-and-I-don’t-know-anything’ charade,” Ruthantasis told Sydney, glancing at her accusingly.

“I’m being serious!” Sydney crossed her arms, offended. “What’s Geveodu?”

Speechless, Ruthantasis looked from Sydney to Krale, whose lips were pursed and whose face was wrapped up in deep concentration.

“That just proves it…” The salad bowl muttered under his breath. “We’re in another world.”

Ruthantasis immediately scoffed. “Stop fooling around, old man. That’s not possible. Even I am educated enough to know that.”

Krale aggressively shushed Ruthantasis into silence. “You may be educated enough to know teleportation isn’t possible now, but you don’t know about the history. About the Primitive Gradanas.”

At this, Krale’s gaze slowly trailed up to Sydney, and a shiver ran down her spine. She was glad Ruth had interrupted Krale before he could say anything else.

“Primitive Gradanas have been extinct for around a decade now. There was a mass killing because of their obnoxious personality. Are you sure you aren’t going a little…” Ruthantasis spun a jelly finger at the side of his head. “Cuckoo?”

Sydney’s mind spun. What are they talking about? Mass killings? She did not like where this conversation was going at all.

“That may be true,” Krale continued, a hand on his chin now as he tried to recall information from his academic years. Sydney had to fight down the urge to cover both her ears with her hands. “But there were also records of Primitive Gradana escapes right before the massacre---records the Gods themselves tried so hard to hide.”

Now, even Ruth was confused. “...What are you saying?”

There was a moment of silence as Krale retreated back into his mind, as if to organise his thoughts. Sydney’s shoulders tensed and she clutched her tote bag tightly to her chest. She didn’t want to know what else the old salad bowl had to say. She wanted to forget any of this ever happened and go back to her normal life. Her body felt too hot and too cold at the same time, and fear crashed around in her gut like a sea storm.

But, when Krale started speaking again, Sydney knew it was too late for that. She would never have her old life back again.

“What I’m saying is…” Krale looked at Ruthantasis, who Sydney could tell was a tornado of emotions just by his face. “We got teleported across the universe by a Primitive Gradana.” Then, as Krale’s eyes trailed up to hers, Sydney’s blood ran cold. He pointed his fork at Sydney.

“She is the lost Primitive.”

Author's Note

written: Oct 2024