Jealousy and Love

Just wanted to get how I've kinda been feeling.

Why am I so scared you'll like her,
Why am I all of sudden so unsure,
About us.

Its not going to change anything for the better,
But inside I cant help but let her,
Make me feel like this.

You told me tonight you couldn't pick your boss,
And once again I feel like I've messed up, at a loss,
Just made it worse.

I don't see how you can't understand,
But then again on the other hand,
You don't know all my past.

You don't know this is how I've seen things start before,
But then again if it we're to become something more,
I know It'd be okay.

Because at least you'd be happy,
Is I guess what I should say,
But to be honest.

I'd be so blue,
I don't know if could get over you,
I've been hurt by so many.

My heart couldn't take another break

Reviews

[emipoemi]

The message/narrative is powerful; the structure is beyond words. I'm debating whether the musicality needs adjustments in a few of the rather wordy places, but you modulate so well, and come back as well, that the iffy musicality isn't quite noted as much. I would however, say that in the wordiest stanza (the antepenultimate, "before/more" rhyme) could use some cutting for better flow, for there is some hint of trying to get all the words out within the given musicality that's one thing you don't want in a poem. But, honestly, bravo! This is fantastic! The stragglers are golden, and the ending is absolutely killer. Well freaking done!

[A.marie.speaks]

i can definitely relate. "why am I all of a sudden for unsure, About us." I find myself thinking like this all the time..

[terry smith]

sometimes coming apart at the seams is the only way to release the dreams never to be, but the dream its self will survive till you find the one to make it thrive.:)

[Saddam]

I'd be so blue,
I don't know if could get over you,
I've been hurt by so many.

My heart couldn't take another break

It was nice and... well I have to say, it seem real. Have got break-up? That's rude of him.
Great pen down there friend. Don't mind my words.

[jb]

Nice poem..lots of truth...I can relate;)