Consequences

Consequences

A Poem by Siren
"

For you, Ryan "

How do I keep forgetting that your dead?
I know it, I know it in my head.

You've been dead for years,
And I no longer shed any tears.

Did you know you would cause this divide,
When you planned your untimely suicide?

They say 'Death be not proud',
But why does he mock and laugh so loud?

We were never close, didn't know you so well,
But somehow your death sent me into a living hell

You haunt me subtly, not like a nagging ghost
But more like a parasite, and I'm the host

Latent you lie, waiting for the time
When death is the only thing on my mind

And that is when I remember you, my friend--
I remember that death will always win. 

© 2012 Siren


Author's Note

Siren
don't have the strength to explain this one yet... but what are your thoughts/reactions?

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Featured Review

This is the kind of poem that just makes me sit here and think. Why was character one shocked that this person died? was their something there, something to be? and why cant this character forget about this person? I really like this poem, the ones that make me think :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Siren

11 Years Ago

His death came as a shock to all of us, really. He was so lovable, and we all felt guilty in some w.. read more
A little twist

11 Years Ago

ahh thats carzy! and to feel guilt thats touching.



Reviews

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Tex
just a wonderful write. it is remarkable for its clarity. I see no need for any explanation. it is moving. it is emotive. it is honest. it reads authentic. what can you do to explain it? nothing.

You might want to remove two syllables in this sentence:

But somehow your death sent me into a living hell (maybe drop living)

and you might want to add one syllable in this sentence:

I remember that death will always win. (maybe: I remember that death, it will always win.)

but as you wish... it is moving and powerful as it is. but the meter is just a tad off on those stanzas and those syllable changes might help.

either way it is a powerful piece. It will touch many readers. It touched me. thank you for such a wonderful write.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Siren

11 Years Ago

I feel a little bit relieved after reading your review. I was a bit afraid that it wouldn't make mu.. read more
Tex

11 Years Ago

ah, I love that you did that... then change your authors note to say that. and Now I reiterate. Ve.. read more
Death can take a toll on those the person left behind, words cannot begin to explain how much we miss those lost and pray for there well being its hard to let go and comprehend when someone is lost, great piece

Posted 11 Years Ago


This is the kind of poem that just makes me sit here and think. Why was character one shocked that this person died? was their something there, something to be? and why cant this character forget about this person? I really like this poem, the ones that make me think :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Siren

11 Years Ago

His death came as a shock to all of us, really. He was so lovable, and we all felt guilty in some w.. read more
A little twist

11 Years Ago

ahh thats carzy! and to feel guilt thats touching.
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soooo deep in a dark morotic way beatiful

Posted 11 Years Ago



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Added on December 8, 2012
Last Updated on December 8, 2012

Author

Siren
Siren

About
Well....if you must know, I (sometimes) live in the real world. I love listening to music because it lets me breathe. I love laughing because it lets me live. I love writing because it lets me (almost.. more..

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