Olive Skinned Empress

If you liked the poem of any of my work, please show some love by 'liking' my facebook page @ www.facebook.com/sunilthewriter - mucho appreciado!

So I’ve heard that your reputation precedes you.

You’re that lady I’ve seen sipping cognac

In a videogame erroneous blue screen disco,

Crashing games and crushing hearts.

 

You’ve heard that my reputation precedes me.

For I’m that adult with youthful eyes

That dart across the room,

Hastily veering towards leggings

That cling to the outside of thighs.

 

So when we eventually crossed paths

And indulged in an orgy

Of cliché ridden conversation,

I went a little too far

And accidently spilt my ego

All over your polka dot dress.

A few silly words,

Yet who would have thought,

That an olive skinned empress

Was so easy to impress?

 

We exchanged social networking details

But I quickly made a dash,

Because I needed to use the toilet -

They call that a ‘s**t and run’.

Author's Note

Any suggestions are welcomed with open arms.

If you liked the poem of any of my work, please show some love by 'liking' my facebook page @ www.facebook.com/sunilthewriter - mucho appreciado!

Reviews

[Brighid an Lasair]

I love the sporadic ending, it really makes the piece change from something reminding me of a stereotypical high class, sleazy affair to something more rough and raw. very nicely played.

[Alicia Schroeder]

Awesome write :)

[Coyote Poetry]

No changes needed in this poem. Photo led reader into a good story in the poem. Many temptations in this world. Some can offer delicate we need to know. I like the surprise ending to the excellent poem.
Coyote

[Clarisse Nanoit]

P.S. I actually DO like the s**t and run--it's an abrupt and unexpected ending--it betrays the mood of the moment. It all sounds so high class and sleazy and then it just gets crude. I love crude. =D

[Clarisse Nanoit]

I love this! The "s**t and run" part is kind of random, but the scene is set rather nicely. My only suggestion would be to add more imagery. I love what you do have, but it almost never hurts to add more. Where exactly are they meeting? Is it smoky there? Loud? Crowded? Are they all but alone? What time of day? The poem is gorgeous the way it is; I'm just being curious, and like I said, more imagery almost never hurts. =) I loved this!
KH

[....]

sipping cognac, not really sure what cognac is, I enjoyed this,
The last stanza, made me laugh. Well written.

[YouoweYoupay]

There's something very personal and inside about this poem, yet it pulled in me from the title top to bottom! Great metaphors, use of words, and rhymes. even though your purpose seems vague, I completely enjoyed this piece. Your words is art.

[Aella.lives]

I don't know why, but I truly truly truly enjoyed this.
"And accidently spilt my ego
All over your polka dot dress."
Loved those two lines.
Awesome work!