BREATH OF DAWN

The escape for rebirth

Down the grassy ground,

Breeze softly shushing

The rustle of leaves underfoot

But crickets were long gone asleep.

 

Crimson face on the horizon

Rising slowly from the east,

Smudge  of light flashing down

the  silhouette, walking on tiptoe.

In every watchful step,

I had my shadow on a leash,

Tied it next to my head.

I waited many moons for bravery.

 

Mephitic fumes of cold years

Killed the words on our lips.

A cut through the tether

Promised us a new scent.

 

While you were the pendulum;

I, the hands of time,

Traveled to widen the distance--

Footprints vanishing.

I said everything to the sun,

And let it be told to you in the morning

When the sunbeam kissed your eyes-

Blazing violet fire.

 

  

Published on 
EMERGE LITERARY JOURNAL
Print

October 2012

Reviews

[Ufi Auttorri ~ Amy C. T..]

The relationship had turned sour and stinking. Angry... they had enough after a while and finally found the courage to walk out at the break of dawn and leave them, still sleeping, knowing the sun would be the only thing they'd see when they awoke. Anything that needed saying was said to the rising sun as they walked away from it all. It happens that way sometimes, doesn't it? Congratulations. Not exactly my cup of tea but I can see the appeal of the visuals, word choice and vignette.

[Cherry Berry]

The imagery in this piece is simply beautiful. Well penned. I enjoyed reading this piece.
xox
Cherri

[Bud]

This is truly a beautiful work of art! The imagery is absolutely outstanding. You have a gifted talent!

[Tha Wind AKA VERBAL OX]

im awed by the descriptiveness an varying degrees of depth u unleashed upon a helpless page...

im not goin to say i could catch everything...u wrote...
yet it didnt take away from the total enjoyment of the write


beautifully done...

1luv keep lovin the pen

[Michael X]

wow, this is beautifully descriptive and alive, and passionately affectionate, sweet and conjuring,
in essence you capture innocent romance and the pinnicle of hearts desire, the metaphorical concepts are gentle and sweeping, lovely, I find myself lost in the dreaminess, and sincerity of sentiment,
brilliantly done and lovely sundae, you have a way with art and wording that combine wih perfect balance

[bluessadmood]

I Said Everything To The Sun..oh what a declaration..
Down grassy grounds breeze softly hissed..rustle of leaves underfoot,crickets long asleep
Crimson horizon rising from east,light pointing to me as I tiptoe
Words killed on my lips,I cut through the tether..a new promise for me
I the hand of time,traveled all distances,leaving behind no footprints
I told the sun everything,and you will be told in the morning
When the sun kissed your eyes,like blazing fire
these are wonderful words of a new dawn,tethers cut,distance walked,many moons in wait for bravery,words no more killed
and we are promised a new scent..
as a new promise..new hope is in sight..
lovely write..

[An owl on the moon]

A beautiful write, with nature in all its glory coming to life. The color, the movement, the majesty all rising with the dawn. So lifting to read.