As Long As I will Love You

As Long As I will Love You

A Poem by stars are far
"

just a love poem

"

Like the breeze that hits your forehead on a summer night

Like the sweet kiss that you get after a small sweet fight

Like a dream that hits your heart and invades your mind

That is my love for you, which I can no more hide.

 

When the sun light hits you tan skin and folds your face

When the land of happiness make you feel the real grace

When the dream that you built start to make some sense

That is the day when my love to you will make some tense.

 

As the moon dance with the earth on the universe melody

As the sun burns from shyness when it stands in front of your beauty

As the sky flies from happiness when the earth admits its love

This is the world that I can see when I reach your face.

 

As long as the skies dance and the  sky sun burns

As long as the moon dance with the lovely earth

As long as the universe sing its songs with grace

That is as long as I will love you and your face.

© 2014 stars are far


Author's Note

stars are far
I hope you like

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Reviews

It seems nature has a way of understanding love. I like your use of the skies, the moon, and the universe. Lovely poem.

Posted 10 Years Ago


I`m just some stuffs over this site so, thought to read yous as well .. this poem`s written not by the hands but its each & every word`s penned by the every individual beat of your sexy heart indeed. I simply adore this beautiful write which`s, yeah, penned with some emotions, feelings of love & misery as well. Well penned.

Posted 10 Years Ago


and a lovely love poem it is. wonderfully written dear.

Posted 10 Years Ago


its beautiful Su, well written hun :)

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A wonderful poem all together...however I agree with my fellow reviewers. there is some structure issues...but to each their own I say! well done! :)

Posted 10 Years Ago


Like it. But you move away from the rhyme schema in verse three and four, not a good idea when you use standard quatrains

Posted 10 Years Ago


"That is my love for you, which I can no more hide." I would change the word 'more' to the word 'longer'. It helps with your flow in that line.

"When the sun light hits you tan skin and folds your face" 'you' should be 'your'

"When the land of happiness make you feel the real grace" 'make' should be 'makes'

"That is the day when my love to you will make some tense." I believe you meant 'tense' to be 'sense'

There are a lot of other lines that are missing plural forms of the word you used. I didn't want to point each one out. Some quick proofreading and you can spot them. :) As always, a beautiful love poem you have here.

~Stefanie



Posted 10 Years Ago


Romantic, as always, your descriptions of love are stellar and poignant. Well done.

Posted 11 Years Ago


This is a beautiful poem keep up the great work and keep sending me more to read i love reading them

Posted 11 Years Ago



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Added on April 25, 2014
Last Updated on April 25, 2014

Author

stars are far
stars are far

Tyre, Lebanon



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