Bird

Actually... this is what I would call a prayer. It is for my nephew, Ian. Who is changing for the better, as you read. Enjoy!

The boy is moving, slowly moving,
beneath the brush, down by the dirt.
His knees are skinned, his voice is sweet,
His ears are open and alert.

He cups his hands in the springbox,
Giant pine, mirrored sky.
The ancient Owl invisible,
Captured in blue eyes.

He knows the song of the meadowlark,
He listens, waits, and then;
he casts an eerie sound,
It glides slowly, on the wind.

A smiling chipmunk rides in his pocket.
Along with some pebbles and dirt.
Elusive motion among afternoon shadows.
His name is Ian, but I call him Bird.

Author's Note

This is a work of fiction. It is however, built out of clear memory.
I don't think I could produce a piece like this just coz.... the words fell out of my anguish concerning my nephew, and I believe that gives it Power.
What do you think?

Reviews

[Crowley]

It gives it all the power in the world my friend. Can't tell you how much I enjoyed this, it hits upon the difficulty of being a boy and trying to find that tightrope path through all the strangleholds on your identity. Fathers who care or who don't, mothers with their favorites, friends who prey because they have an inch more leadership ability and throw everyone to the wolves for their own enjoyment. This was really good...you should do some artwork and frame this poem with it, it carries weight.

[GreenSkeleton16]

very powerful! :)
just the fact that you feel it was something worth writing about made it 10 times more powerful. someone writing about a memory of their nephew and it something beautiful like this, its so sweet and thanks for sharing!

[jenniewren (J.W. Bouwma..]

this is beautiful. it feels powerful for many reasons.. for your hope for him, for your love, for the images and simple language you use. they all grant it a mantra like quality.. amazing.

[luciddreamer]

lol...ok must of been drunk giving last review....doesn't make sense....what I meant to say was I have problems being descriptive also...but you didn't have a problem here....very vivid images....enjoyed it tremendously :)

Peace
Robin

[Samuel Dickens]

You're more of a poet than most, Tony. In my book you are, at least. You already know that I love this. It's so approachable, honest and real. Not only that, but it rhymes quite well. I agree that stories are much harder to write than poems, too.

[luciddreamer]

I like this...yea I have being descriptive also.....but you sure didn't here :)

Peace
Robin