Determination

Personal resolution... The ghosts of the past still haunt me. I am making myself strong enough to overcome them, they are holding me back more than I like.

 

Time to deal with this,

Once and for all.

These scars are hurting innocents,

Most of all, the one I love.

I'm making a stand,

F**k whatever's within.

Cn't talk to my mother,

Not taking that gun.

I'll face it man to man.

I'm twisted inside,

All of my scars hide

Th man I'm capable

Of living on as.

They're taking away

The woman I love,

Hurting her with insecurities.

As it is part of me,

It is I causing the pain.

I won't tolerate

My lack of faith

In other people,

They aren't my mother.

Who says they will violate

The trust I placed in them?

 

No, I'm done.

I don't care if I get hurt,

Don't give a f**k if it's against my fears

I'll trust and see what occurs.

 

I'll give the trust

She deserves,

The faith that

She'll never hurt me.

Reviews

[Tai Chi Italy]

As to trust John....every one of us walks that fearful path, especially when we feel we have been let down badly in the past, it is hard to trust, barriers go up, we clam up and indeed hurt the ones around us whom we so love. Far better, as you so rightly state here, to trust again, but we cannot gaurantee or put a proviso on trusting, in not getting hurt again, because we will, unless we live in a bubble, BUT! and this is the biggy, if we don't trust, we miss out on all the loving that interacting with people brings, little things and big things....IT can never always be perfect but it can be magical again....In this lousy world we live in, it is hard to trust in anything, never mind having been so let down....your fears are justified and your actions here speak loud of the man you have become....One fine young man....We all need someone to trust, she needs you and you need her, that's perfect. Smiling at you, Tai x

[ShAdOw]

you have to trust, if you dont you will never know what its like to expierence true love hun...


truly .. you must trust her with your heart.

[♥ Courtney &hear..]

Babe ...


You can trust me. :)

[O!]

A good personal resolution. We all face demons on our journey of life and those demons will keep haunting and so the trick is to handle them while theyre trouble and write them off!....life will seem simpler then....take it from an expert! ;-)

Have faith in urself. If u werent strong enough to handle those demons u wouldve never encountered them.....so have faith in urself!

x,
O!

[None]

This is a powerful poem, John. You have a true gift to be able to get down your emotions on paper in the middle of difficult times. You have what it takes within you as you say to face what has happened in the past and what is to come. Strong writing!

[Imperfection]

It is as difficult as impossible to get over a difficult past. That is something one must accept and live with. But hardships mustn't be allowed to prevent you from becoming who you can become.

This is a matter of time more than a matter of strength.
You're a strong man John. And this is a passing phase. You will work it out. All of us have to learn to be patient and perseverant.
I like the title of the poem. It is a magical word. Your choice of 'Determination' says that you believe that you will emerge successful.

[Jessica Benfield]

i dont know what to say... it may sound cliche and really stupid, but im proud of you. this is a really big step, and a really good one too. im so glad you wrote this piece. i know you've been hurt, and i cant fathom how much pain you've gone through. this is amazing, truly...

having said that:

trust is something not easily won. especially with all this. learning to trust is one of the hardest things in the world to do. we all go through our own personal problems and ordeals in our lives - whather falling and scraping your knee, or falling from a tree and breaking your neck, (metaphorically). and we all have our own ways of dealing with it. and its us and us alone who can take that first step on the road to moving past it. old wounds will heal, but scars last an eternity. there might always be a pain there, but maybe if we become... okay? with the fact of what happened and what will always be, and understand what really happened, we can learn to move on, and place our trust in others. slowly - but surely, trust may come. but you have to want it, and really strive for it. and with reading this piece, john, im positive everything will turn out for the better. i truly think with writing this piece, you're more ready and willing than ever to move on and let the past be the past... moving forward... its amazingly... i dont even know the word for it... wonderful? to read this piece, and the meaning behind it, and see you in this sate of mind. amazing... thats abot all i can say... amazing...

smiles,
jess

[desertraven]

Now that's the John we all know and love!!
Sandra