Chamomile Memories

Kind of a journal entry type thing...

 

        It’s that sweet smell, the gentle taste that does it for me. I automatically am taken back to at least two years ago, when the problems that led up to the current situation weren’t so overbearing, when life seemed peaceful. When a mother and her son would watch movies late on the weekends, sipping their chamomile tea. Life seemed difficult then through the close-minded eyes of the teen I was, the kid that was me before I needed to grow up so fast. I had no idea that homework was nothing, a D in math is a small matter.

        I had what mattered in those moments, the opportunities to ask advice, to learn from one of my parents. Of course, I had no idea then how little time I had to take that opportunity then. I can’t be blamed for something that has no fault. Yet, I still feel a nagging guilt that I didn’t at least treasure those moments. Yes, I watched mom’s chick flicks with her, begrudgingly. Nobody else would and I figured that it was my duty as her son, and a supposed mama’s boy (guilty as charged!). I still could have taken more enjoyment from it, gotten more involved in the stories, the underlying words and poetics of the movies. Nope, I sat and sipped my chamomile tea and pretended to watch, zoning out and thinking of pranks at school, the next dirty joke I would hsare with the guys.

        What makes one do that? Why can we not enjoy the time more that w have with those loved ones? The reflection hurts, seeing how truly disrespectful we are, I was. I could have been more loving. But no, I was selfish, a sschoolboy who was more focused on his friends than his family.

        It has been at least 1 year, 1 month and 29 days since I drank tea, a drink that I shared with my mother. These memories are born of chamomile’s sweet scent, and gentle taste.

Reviews

[Enigma]

Wow! That's one powerful and emotional piece.
I can sense my feelings up there.We realise thw worth of things only when they're not with us anymore.It's more of my story too up there.I could've been more caring, more respectful more loving....
Skillfully penned!! I'll read it again and again...

[Mysty Rayn]

So sad, so sweet. Hold on to those memories. THank you so much for sharing this with me. I loved reading this.

[mrowepat]

Very sad. I too have made that mistake. It's hard to realize when you're young what is and what isn't all that important. The only thing you can do is learn from the past and apply the lessons learned so as not to repeat previous mistakes. I always make time for my mother now and actually talk to her about important stuff and enjoy our time together. I hope your mother is still around.

[*~Imperfectly Me~*]

this is a wonderful piece.... it's so amazing how just a scent can take you back so many years.... like go sniff a crayon.... it'll transport you back to elementary school lol.... This is a great piece! Great job!

[allwrite]

What a lovely piece. Isn't it amazing how just the hint of a scent can take you back?

How lucky she was to have a son that would spend time with her watching chick flicks. I know I enjoy that with my son!!!(even if he is zoning out � at least he is doing it with me). Just know that she enjoyed having you there � whether you were entirely there, or not.

I think we all have regrets of one kind or another. Would we be human if otherwise? Just remember that you did spend time with her.

Hugs
Allwrite

[Bubo]

Such a deeply sad write.........but you know, i no of no other lad that would watch soppy flicks and sip tea with
his mum.........and the fact you did counts so much..........your love is evident for your Mum, and she will
have known that and probably been smiling away that you simply had time to sit!
The gentleness of those times make u the writer and man you are..........sensitive and loving.........no regrets,
your mum would never want that.

[Vatsayayana]

Bitter sweet my dear. Bitter sweet.
I remember too many occasions like the one above.
Ahhh... to be foolish, carefree children. To not appreciate.
But strength is in memory, be it good or bad, strength resides in remembering. And in embracing all aspects of life. It may have sad memories tied therein, but you drank the tea didn't you? And with that gentle taste, that gentle thought, you can pull back to you that gentle voice of Mother.

[Tai Chi Italy Take Two]

This broke my heart John! Your mother would be so proud of you as I feel I am right now. We all look back at the we had with a million regrets, but! as you say, we were not to know how little we had with our loved ones, but you were there for her and she you, as she is now, still loving and protecting you in her angelic way, they never leave us John! I know it is hard to believe that right now, but it is true, love has no barriers. You describe your time with your mother so vividly, I almost feel I knew her and that is a fine ability you have there, to take the reader by the hand and really acquaint them with the emotions of the characters involved. You are a fine and loving son. Remember that, for they passed to you everything good they had to. Have a peaceful sunday, hug from LLB

[Nely Amorim]

very moving and oh so true... but a wisdom that only comes with age and maturity... it's the age old saying.. if only I knew then what i know now.... I have those very same memories of mum and dad... missed chances to learn..grow..laugh..love my family..wasted moments with "friends" who's names i can no longer remember...for what?...
your writing really affected me... thank you.

[Imperfection]

Familiar feelings, yes.
I have given myself a few reasons to regret too.
I certainly have learned from such incidents. But unfortunately I cannot have those moments back.
The only thing I can do to help myself is to value what I have left, as of now - the people around me, circumstances, gifts...

This piece made me think on those. Thanks for that.