Demonic Cherubs

inspired by "Infant Joy" and "Infant Sorrow" by William Blake

The child cried, the mother wept. She knew not where her mind was kept. He kept her up late at night, And sleep was not her evening flight. He spittled always on her clothes, And rivers ran from his button nose. Blubbering! Screaming! Flailing about!- As if he suffered from the gout. A demon he was, owned he Hell's key; An angelic cherub, never would she see. She crawled from bed to the evil child, His screeching growing oh so wild. But as she held him in her arms, He was free from the world's harms. His brightened eyes shone up above. He looked to her like a peaceful dove. "You are my baby," she said to thee. "A child from God, a gift I see! "I love you dearly, my gentle boy; A gift, a treasure, the place of Troy." She kissed him softly on the head, And lay him back down in his bed. He cooed at her and she smiled so. "This babe's my prince, that I know." She would not trade him for the world, Not even for all its gold. A child is the ultimate kiss, Through laughter and sadness and anger and bliss. Hold a child close to your heart, And never, ever let him part. Your child is yours, that is true, But did you know, this child is you? Love him, teach him, let him grow. Thank you he will more than you know. Children are forever, only fading never. They are the future and our only endeavor. Thank you for the children, Through thick and thin. The ups and downs, Our next of kin, Bless you.

Author's Note

advanced critique appreciated

Reviews

[Legion]

Thanks for them indeed. The poem itself is good with its message and even its rhyme scheme. I was a bit troubled by the sudden change between the first and the second stanza and then never returning to the reasoning behind the behavior (that, or honestly, I just missed it and if that is the case my apologizes). Perhaps another stanza delving deeper into the the reason for the hellish nature. Anyway, your style is impressive. Kudos.

[Shellie]

I thought you did an expert job of slidinf from stanza 1 to stanza 2. [are you the girl who wrote 'Leah?']
Anyway back to this... There's only 1 or 2 maybe 3 things....

Blubbering! Screaming! Flailing about!-
As if he suffered from the gout.

i find the use of the word gout makes the lines influential under forced rhyme.

Then after stanza 1, as the baby seems a noisy one you say the mothr speaks to him'gentle boy' is that just to show she thinks of him that way because of unconditional love, it could be, im just enquiring.


Apart from that, it was written with alot of depth and feeling, it seems you were very passionate with your thoughts for this piece...your inspiration for this is great because William Blake inspired you to write this pice and maybe yours will inspire someone else to write another take, and the world of riting whirls around. Great job honestly.