vain.

the sadistic pleasure that runs through every mans veins; something we often classify as a-okay. well, it's f*****g not.

We are all sadists.

You are a sadist.

I am a sadist.

We don't think about our self worth, we think about others low worth. We often excuse ourselves from the table to wrap our heads around the reason why we hate someone so much, and determine it's their fault. We call ourselves moral and criticize what others have to say and when the other portrays some sort of mistake, we laugh. We laugh and laugh and laugh- or put the weight onto our shoulders about how much we disagree. It's all about us; it's all about what we have to say and what we have to think. Our two cents is worth more than another's life, there's no saying otherwise.

We hold our breaths under water to watch others drown, and re-emerge to suck in a good breath of polluted air. The same air that could've been clean if we hadn't come around.

We are the same jocks with the football jackets in the movies. We are the same pricks with fowl language at the gas station who can't keep our eyes off the pretty woman coming out the shop with 3-too-many kids in the back-seat. We are the same m***********s we spit at before the television screen, whether we acknowledge it or not. We're all just train wrecks, f*****g nutshells in the confinements of our cold homes we aren't even grateful for. As far as I know, humanity is nothing but a conflict.

I cry when I see a young man being tortured for his sexuality, and shake my head at the woman who thinks she knows better, but then again; at those moments, I cease to realize just how badly i've done myself. I've said the word f****t, then cursed the next person to do so. I've laughed at people; the ones you crack a joke at with the lame line "some people should be banned from BK". I've brought people lower to satisfy myself, then I lecture the person who does just a little less.

I see no reasoning, I just do. I shout out to the skies when I see that a chick doesn't contemplate on consequences, yet I haven't done so in a while. I do not seek responsibility, yet I throw it places i've never been, but alas, there was always that excuse about being flawed.

We're all flawed, I know. And there's no fault in nature, but how about in law school when 

someone has to take the blame?

What about the thing with 

trying to get better?

We feel no regret in humiliating others, or destroying another guys reputation, but hey, if you do so to me...you'll burn in hell.

[audio] NOTE: not the exact text.

Author's Note

i'm currently overwhelmed, right now. i'll possibly delete this later.

Reviews

[Chris]

Don't delete it... I actually logged back in to leave this note... Few will ever agree with everything... even the author (the morning after), but - you spoke up. And after all, that is what we do - speak up (or at least wish we had).

This was a good read. And tomorrow is a Saturday...