Tainted

They throw money at every problem

No one will talk to me

They won't speak to me

Years with no words

No one reaching out

Not a single time

The pain of the silence

Only stings me when I remember

When expectations of my loyalty

Tied to the money given in behalf of me

A choice that I never made

Gifts with only strings attached

Tell me why you wont let me finish speaking

Too afraid of the truth

Too afraid of what it will do to you

So you drag me there too

How long must I fight these expectations

Of reaching out to people

Who wont reach out to me

Believing the lies of the black sheep

Outcasted with a reason so justified I couldn't argue

Living in changes now

Changes I made for myself

Only to find myself outcasted harder and deeper

By the same people who wanted me to change

People who taught me how to hate myself

with such intense vigor I couldn't let go

Now that I'm gone,

There is no scapegoat,

And when I come back changed

They have no one left to blame

For the hate that boils inside

And I won't cater

And I won't pander

I won't be your puppet

I won't be

No I won't be your scapegoat

Your technicolor dream coat

The brother you sold

Left out in the cold

Wanting to die

So abandoned

I just wanted to die

But I found a dark kind of hope inside

And I came back prepared to lead the tribe

A silent led example

In the way I lead my own life

Surrounded by those never strong enough

To speak up in a crowded room

Imprisoned, impassioned, by the approval of others

A pack constantly falling apart

Because all they have is their fear

As they shun the only one who's brave

To rise out of the black tar that held us all together

Showing everyone another way