Top 10 Reasons Why UFOs Don’t Visit the Philippines

Top 10 Reasons Why UFOs Don’t Visit the Philippines

 

By S. R. Morris

 

Many people are fascinated by UFO stories or news articles about UFO sightings or abductions. Headlines about UFOs, even in tabloids, are among the most popular or read in many magazines, newspapers and other publications. The most curious items are the ones about people who claim to have been abducted by aliens.

 

One of the most popular destinations of UFOs are the United States and Russia. But when was the last time you heard about a UFO sighting in Madagascar or Tasmania or Iceland? It seems that aliens from other planets (or galaxies) have a preference to visit places that are popular to us also. The question, however, is why? Why do they prefer some countries more often than others and why do they seemingly avoid other countries?

 

Since I had traveled to the Philippines many times in the past 20 years, I began to wonder why we rarely hear about UFO sightings or abductions in the Philippines. Why aren’t they visited by aliens from other planets? What keeps them from paying us a quick visit? After extensive research and study of UFOs, I’ve found the top ten reasons why they don’t visit people in the Philippines.

 

#1. Aliens are afraid of Manny Pacquiao. Most aliens are well-versed in current events and, more than likely, they’ve seen a few of Manny Pacquiao’s fights. Everyone has seen how he loves to fight with other fighters not in his weight class. Many believe that aliens from other galaxies know they don’t stand a chance of taking over the planet as long as Pacquiao is around.

 

#2. There’s really no place to safely land a UFO anywhere in the country. Since the Philippines is one of the most densely populated countries in the world, aliens know it would be almost impossible (not to mention dangerous) to land one of their spacecrafts anywhere in the country.

 

#3. It’s believed that Karaoke sounds hurt or damage their ears. This may be a little known fact, but studies(?) show that aliens can’t sing and sounds produced by karaoke machines is not within their audible range of pleasant sounds. It’s also believed that it damages their hearing.

 

#4. Many scientists believe that aliens are allergic to rice. This has not been proved, but some well-known and respected scientists believe that aliens have a biological hypersensitivity to rice and rice products. While many citizens of this planet have added products like soy, peanuts and wheat, to their “do not use” list, it’s very possible that “other worldly” visitors cannot tolerate rice in their system.

 

#5. It’s very possible that aliens from other planets recognize that Filipinos are too tech savvy. As previously mentioned, aliens are aware of current events and current trends. They evidently know that Filipinos are tech savvy and are natural entrepreneurs. Filipinos catch on fast and can produce the same product cheaper than in other countries. It is unsure whether aliens are afraid that Filipinos will find a cheaper way to produce a UFO, or whether they will try to pack more people into a UFO than is safe for interplanetary travel. Either way, it is certain that aliens avoid the Philippines for that reason.

 

#6. Aliens are aware that Magellan lost his life in the Philippines and don’t want to make the same mistake. Aliens not only keep up on current events, they also read world history. They know that Magellan attempted to go around the world in his ship, but lost his life and a ship in the Philippines. Truthfully, this may be more of a cosmic superstition than actual fear of losing a spacecraft in the islands.

 

#7. They can’t afford to abduct a Filipino’s whole family. Those people who have been abducted and probed often remember their experience in a UFO lab. Many say their examination and probing took place in a smaller area than first believed. In addition, UFOs do not usually abduct whole groups. For that reason, aliens may have found it is not advisable abduct a Filipino because many would insist that they must abduct close family members as well. As mentioned in number 5, this may again be a safety issue.

 

#8. Filipinos can put aliens to shame when it comes to dancing. Medical experts believe that almost all the aliens who have visited our planet are not capable of the dancing moves that most Filipinos can. It is possible that they are afraid (and too proud) to be filmed in the Philippines and worry they may ultimately show up on a You Tube video or, even worse, a TV show like “So You Think You Can Dance.”

 

#9. The typical vacation in the Philippines is too cheap and aliens may be embarrassed or ridiculed by their alien friends. It is only conjecture, but some UFO experts believe that many UFO aliens actually visit Earth for a vacation with their families. The “prestige factor” comes into play at this point. They may get ridiculed by their neighbors if they return to their home planet with a t-shirt that says, “I Love Cebu” or “I Shop in Makati.”

 

#10. Those tarsier monkeys scare the cosmos compost out aliens from other planets. The Philippines is one of the few places you can find Tarsier monkeys (those tiny creatures with the big, over-sized eyes) and it appears that are scary to aliens around the universe. A recently leaked document from Area 51 records indicates that one of the aliens captured at Roswell admitted that looking at a photo of a tarsier was “scary.” The creature said it was “like looking in the mirror” after waking with a hangover.

 

So, what have we learned? It’s obvious that many visitors in UFOs are prone to visit the same places we like to visit, with some exceptions. One of those places is the Philippines for the reasons enumerated above. For that reason, it is obvious that one of the safest places to visit on earth (without fear of being abducted by UFOs) is the Philppines.

 

 

 

Reviews

[Clif]

I found the article very amusing. Have you ever seen Communion? The aliens did a little dancing with Whitley.