Living Nightmare

(7)

Living Nightmare

The car ride back to Lorelai’s was just as fun as their beach day. Stereo blasted, singing off key, windows down and their hair being blown around everywhere. The quick flash of each passed street light reminded Amalia of a strobe light, stalling movements, pulsing to the beat. Save the night she wore her socks, this was the freest she had ever felt. Of course, the conversation was mainly focused on the newfound boys in their lives.

“Admit it, you like him!”

“I’ll admit nothing. I shoved his face in the sand, Amalia. Hardly any guy’s idea of a whirlwind romance,” Lorelai smirked.

“Oh, but you both loved it!”

“Beside the point.” They laughed and moved on to talking about Kris, Lorelai’s new favorite subject. “He’s in love with you.”

“He is not.”

“Fine. You’re in love with him.”

“Lorelai!” Amalia hit her arm and Lorelai opened her mouth in faux disbelief. Amalia didn’t bother continuing the fight that was about to start. They arrived at Lor’s around eleven. Amalia loved her house. It was a beautiful but simple two story house, painted a faded yellow. It looked like a perfect, quaint country house. Of course, the inside showcased her family’s wealth, but it was nowhere near as over the top as Molly’s decorating.

They raided the fridge when they got inside and carried as much as they could to Lorelai’s room. Amalia fell asleep an hour later, not up to their famous all-nighters. She dreamed of Kris like she knew she would. It was a nice departure from the nightmares of her parents arguing and screaming.  The night passed and she woke up to a good morning text from Kris.

“What’s it say?” Lorelai sang.

“He wants to take me to dinner tonight.” She saw Lorelai getting ready to gloat. “He also says Jackson misses you.”

“He did not!” She sulked and Amalia knew she’d won this battle. She texted back yes and then put her phone aside. As soon as the phone hit the floor, it rang. With a groan, Amalia answered Molly’s call.

“Yes, Mom?”

“Where are you?” She sounded angry for some reason, angrier than a woman who had just been exposed should be. She should be walking around with a vat of ice cream.

“Lorelai’s. You know that, I told you that,” she snapped back. Honestly, she was way past tired of her mother’s ridiculous games.

“Well come home, we need to talk.” With that, Molly hung up, leaving her daughter completely clueless. Amalia wondered what could be so serious that it needed a private setting; she felt like her whole life had been on display lately. Lorelai raised an eyebrow.

“She wants to talk to me.”

“Now? I had a whole day planned out!” She crossed her arms and pouted, making Amalia laugh. Nothing Lorelai did was ever construed as mad or any other emotion than happy, which was a blessing.

“Yeah, well…” 

She packed up and had Lorelai drive her home. As soon as she walked in the door, Pooka attacked her with kisses. Molly was standing in the doorway of the kitchen with a disapproving look on her face.

“What, Mom?”

“That dog’s mouth is infested with germs and you let her lick your face?” Her nose actually wrinkled in disgust. Amalia sighed.

“I’m sure the maid is waiting to whisk me off to the shower and scrub my precious little face clean. So what do we need to talk about?”

“Your father filed for divorce yesterday.” 

She paused and Amalia waited for the rest. “Is that a surprise to you?”

“Watch it, young lady. I can’t live in this house anymore. There are too many memories with Samuel here… It’s too much.”

Amalia snorted. “Right. You just can’t pay the bills on your own. Now that we cleared that up, is there anything else? Where are we going to go?” Her mother hesitated. It wasn’t a hard question but for some reason it was causing Molly to exert a great deal of effort. “Mom?”

“Well, sweetie…” And then Amalia knew.

“No way! Are you kidding me? Can’t you ask one of your friends or sisters? I am not moving in with the guy you left Dad for! You’re insane, really.”

“Amalia, stop it. We’re not discussing it.” 

“Like hell we aren’t!” Amalia was furious. What was going on in Molly’s head? Did she legitimately think this was going to go over well? 

“I’m the adult, I’m the parent. I decide where we go and whether you agree or not doesn’t matter. We’re going to Matthew’s and that’s final.”

“Matthew? No.” She ran up to her room and dialed Kris. He answered almost right away.

“Hey Amalia!”

“Want to make that dinner a lunch?”

He detected the urgency in her voice. “No problem. I’ll be there in five minutes.”

Amalia absentmindedly pet Pooka while she waited. She thought about calling her dad and ranting to him about her mom’s deranged idea, but she knew that wouldn’t help in the end. He had already told her she couldn’t live with him. She laid down and took a deep breath. This is not my life.

A memory came back to her in that moment. Suddenly she was ten years old again, reliving the family vacation to Vermont for skiing. Of course, she had been way too young for the big and fun slopes so her mom spent the entire day with her trying to teach her on the bunny slope for little kids. Amalia remembered that Dad had run into some old friends and went for drinks, that’s why she had been alone with Molly. When Amalia fell down, there was Mom to help her up and tell her to try again. What had happened between then and now? When had their comfortable position in society gone to her mother’s head and turned her into such a b***h?

The doorbell brought Amalia back to reality. She smirked at the fact that Kris actually got out of his car to pick her up instead of just honking. What a gentleman I’ve got. Her own thought confused her because she didn’t even know what they were yet, if she could call him her own.

“Amalia!” Molly screamed up the stairs.

“Coming.” She walked downstairs to face her mom, who looked angry. “Before you ask, I’m going out with a friend and I’ll be back later.” Molly said nothing, just turned away from her daughter and into the kitchen, probably for a drink. Amalia opened the door to Kris’s smiling face and felt her anger and disappointment in her mother dissolve. She hugged him tight and whispered in his ear, “I’m so glad you’re here.”

He hugged back just as firmly, making her feel safe. “Me too. Ready to eat?”

“Ready for anything at this point.”

“Well then, shall we milady?” He offered his arm, but before she could take it, Molly intruded on them.

“Excuse me, young man. Where do you think you’re going with my daughter?” It was horrendous. Having to watch her mother act like she actually cared was physically painful. And the way she talked to Kris- like he was a thief and not just a boy caught in the middle.

“Mom, I already told you. I’m going out.”

“No, you’re not. Come in,” she said, now addressing Kris. He looked confused and uncomfortable and Amalia couldn’t blame him. He was about to experience the disaster that was her mother for himself and few people survived long term exposure to her. He glanced to her for help, but Amalia could do nothing but shrug.

He stepped inside and the interrogation began.

“What’s your name?”

“Kristofer Rollins, ma’am.” It almost pained her to see Kris be so polite. Her mother looked him up and down, scowling all the while. She led them to the living room and Amalia suddenly felt like a perpetrator in her own house. Molly made them sit on the couch together and took the chair across from them for herself.

“How do you know my daughter, Kristofer?”

“I met her here, Mrs. Linden.” Molly flinched at the use of her married name, now that she was about to lose it, but she continued anyways.

“What are you trying to do with her?”

“Mom!” Amalia stood up in disbelief. Was her mother honestly suggesting that they were trying to have sex? Was she disillusioned? The answer to that was clearly a yes. “You leave Kris alone and stop interrogating him like he’s committed a crime! Believe it or not, Molly, I have friends and they’re concerned about me.”

“How dare you, Amalia. I am your mother, show me some respect!”

“Any respect I was obligated to give you went out the window when you destroyed this family. I don’t owe you anything. And I’m moving.”

This caused Molly to burst out in laughter. “And just where do you think you’ll be going? I am still your mother and that gives me some entitlement to you and a right to tell you what you can and can’t do.”

“I don’t care. Listen…Mom,” Amalia said with some effort. Kris was just staring at his hands at this point, all his poise and courage gone. “The only things you have ever done for me were with some selfish purpose. You forced me into clothes I would never wear normally, but I did because I know your precious image is important to you. You’ve whisked me off to countries I didn’t know existed, if for no other reason than to hold it over your rich friends’ heads. You put me in a school full of girls and I think it was probably to stop me from doing something rebellious with a boy. All I’ve ever wanted was a normal family, a normal life. Do you know what I got? I was given a great dad, but I hardly got to see him. So I ended up spending my days in this absolutely ridiculous house with an absolutely laughable excuse for a mother!”

In her rage, Amalia had gotten so close to Molly, they were barely a foot apart. Her face was beat red, her eyes were swelling with tears and her body was shaking uncontrollably. She knew she’d hurt Molly, she could see it in her eyes. The room was silent. Seventeen years of bottled feelings had surfaced and now they lingered all around, watching the scene below.

Kris was gently pulling her arm, trying to lead her away before she could cause anymore damage. Amalia’s feet were moving backwards, but she didn’t remember authorizing such movement. 

“Wait.” 

“Amalia, I think you need to cool down,” Kris said.

She ignored him and turned back to her mother, who was still sitting on the chair and watching her daughter in disbelief.

“I don’t know where I’m going. All I know is that I can’t live here anymore. I can’t live with your boyfriend, either. Nothing will change, you know. We’re going to have the same relationship once I’m gone as we’ve had my whole life.”

This statement actually caused Molly to get up and go upstairs without a second glance at Amalia. She looked at Kris now.

“That was harsh,” he observed.

“Kris, please don’t judge me. I know it was harsh, but that’s been my life. I’ve never told her any of that and she needed to know. It’s suffocating living in this house.”

Amalia knew there was a part of her finally surfacing that she had kept hidden for years, and she wasn’t sure what to think. Yes, she’d been downright mean to her mother, but wasn’t it justified?

Wasn’t it?