Hello, I'm Nobody (About Me)

This is a memoir on writing.

I grew up in the suburbs of Cleveland, Ohio. I was an only child, and I was often
looking for ways to entertain myself. I was a very unusual child. I was afraid of lint. My
uncle use to pull the lint out of the register, and chase me with it. I had a rocking horse
named King Kong.
I started writing when I was five years old. When my great-grandmother used to
babysit me, I would sit on the couch, and write stories about dogs, my Grandma Gwen,
England, and Alfred Hitchcock parodies, while listening to re-runs of the "Golden Girls,"
and "Alfred Hitchcock's Mystery Theatre. I was a mischevious child. I used to put rocks
under my great grandma's pillow, before she would go to bed.
I never had many friends growing up. I used to hang out with this tomboy, and we use
to play with matchbox cars in the school playground. I never cared much for dolls.
As a teenager, I didn't do a whole lot of writing. I mostly wrote angry song lyrics. I
joined a martial arts class when I was 13. My karate teacher was of the most inspirational
people, I've met in my life. I was always kind of a loner, with an inadequacy complex.
He taught me to believe in myself.
At the age of 18, my writing had evolved to magical lands, and outer space. I wrote
more as an escape. I always felt like something was missing in my life.
In my twenties, I suffered through a terrible marriage.
Now that I'm in my thirties, I have a new appreciation for writing. I feel like I have
discovered my writing voice. Now I've included humor, ghost stories, mythological
creatures, and political parodies, into my writing.