The Blue Elk

This I wrote in a moment of anguish

I awaken to the sun shining on me. My vision is blurry, my body is heavy, my head is light. Finally things clear up. I see the dream catcher above my bed, the crystals glycening. I look to my right and see the bottles of whiskey next to me. Next to them are the thick stack of divorce papers. I just lay there for a moment. Then I remember...

I feel a sharp pain in my head. It came like lightning when I began to remember. I fell out of my bed with a huge thud. The bottles fell onto me. I felt the weight of my being force me down. It took everything I had to get up. 

I stagger to my window, piecing my night back together. I recall the courier bringing the documents to my door, me driving to the bar, and taking that first sip of alcohol. I walk over to my desk and pick up my pill container. I can only stare at them, thinking about what they have done to me, my career and my marriage.

I walk over to the porch and stare at the lake below. The memories of buying this house came rushing back. The process of picking it out, the details of the furniture, the smell of the place once we were finally done unpacking.... These were the good times.... the times before I was diagnosed. 

I see the winding staircase leading down to the lake and think of all that we had planned, all our work fixing up the place, the love we made..... Then I remember it all being ruined in one instant. I look at the pills again. I remember the doctor telling me what I had. I remember the reaction of my wife, I remember the pain it brought her. Things only got worse after that day. I throw the pills through the window, the glass falling outside. The rampage that ensued was nothing short of destruction. I tore the room apart, my rage fueling me. I finally stop. 

I am breathing heavily, sweating, then I look out the shattered window. I cannot believe what I am seeing. It is beautiful, yet terrifying, elegant, yet… I cannot help but go towards it. I go slowly, step by step, trying not to scare it away. Making my way down the stairs, my eyes are locked to it. It glares back at me with almost a remorseful gaze. I am so close, I can almost touch it.

I hear a crack, as I look down I see that I stepped on a branch. When I look up, it is in the distance. I chase it, trying to catch it, to prove it is real; I must prove it to myself, that I am not crazy. I must prove to myself that I am only having a bad dream, that I will wake up and my wife will be there.

I get closer, and closer, it is within my grasp. Then it jumps, and I jump after it. The creature is flying, I cannot believe it. Then I look down and see that it did not jump, but that I had fallen. What I failed to realize was that I had ran nearly a mile, to the cliffs. As I fall, time stands still. I think about everything, my wife, my home, my life. The ground gets closer, and closer…closer…clos…

Then there was nothing.

Reviews

[James Watts]

Not a bad piece. A missing comma here and there but nothing major.

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

Beautiful. This story is another writers cafe workshop. Your imagery was beautiful, but most of all, pure genius with the metaphors and symbolism. Your imagination was great, but your technical skills stole the spotlight. 100(+1)

[Silere]

Great job.. You paint a really good picture of despair and disbelief of one's own actions. You have a great imagination indeed. To see one's life flash before their eyes is common but I like that you added it in.. it gave this sad ending a very nice touch...and no mention of the pills.. just the good things. Thank you for sharing!

[Jacqueline Lopez]

PERFECTION and nothing less! EXCELLENTLY WRITTEN. The whole story is just ... I'm speechless. Beautiful. I like how you also came up with this idea of the elk. One of the best stories I've read so far.

[deeps]

This is amazing! Full of emotion.
I found this to be a powerful write.

[H-Jonesy]

this piece is full of power and sadness at the same time. i like that in the story u never said what you were chasing, but instead(and corect me if im wrong) you said it in the title. wonderful i enjoyed reading this.

[LeeLee Ryder]

WOW, Starfox...THE BLUE ELK is full of power & heart felt sadness. Self realization can be a motha sometimes. You painted a wicked web of anguish and regret, my friend ... Funny, but my dad told me about a dream he had. He was a water buffalo, trying to communicate with family & friends with no success. He kept scratching words in the dirt... I bring it up cus, water buffalo and blue elks are of the same "elk", so to speak ... Serendipitous indeed!.. Thanks for sharing!
LLR