There was a girl who didn’t know she was in love. There was a guy who couldn’t love, well at least not her. All through the day she would be as happy as she could ever be until one small thing made her think of him. He was her best friend, she was his best friend. She would cry and he would feel sorry for himself. No matter what she did or did not do she was never enough for him.
What got it all started was some fun in the movies with another friend by her side. They didn’t even know each other. That changed when they talked all night and he spilled his heart to her. She was hidden from everyone for she was the girl on the side. He didn’t want anyone to know he was cheating on the girl he said “I love you” to so much. The difference was it was never a quick f**k, but the never kissed, they would f**k but never kiss. They both thought it was friends with benefits. It became something so much more. He would talk all day about others girls even talk with them on the phone while they spent all there time together but she didn’t care she became trapped by his sweet words of love.
One day they kissed and she though nothing of it she became use to being the girl on the side. Although he did start saying he wanted to be with her and not the other girl. But what girl has not heard that story before? She loved the idea and wanted so much to believe it. He broke up with the other girl but did not get with her, she understood at first, he needed time, he didn’t want to make it look like they were fooling around the whole time.
She became insecure when he did nothing but talk about being with others wanting to have his fun. She picked fights with him constantly and became jealous over little things. For some reason that she still does not understand why he put up with it. She would start horrible fights and then say sorry. He never walked away. He just continued to talk about the one he was in love with. He tried to get back with the one he was in love with, but it never happened.
The girl and the guy continued to fight. She went out with another for a short time. It didn’t last she wanted him. He was scared that he lost her. Everything was ok until he kept saying over how much he wanted to be with her but he couldn’t. She didn’t understand after everything they did, everything they went threw, he still didn’t want her. He continued to treat her as more then a friend, she became confused and though he wanted more.
He met somebody new, she started to drink more. She became somebody else and wanted to hurt him. She did, she said awful things and did horrible things that even to this day she does not remember. What she does remember was going to the movies and seeing them hold hands. The girl approached her and asked what was going on between the two of them. she didn’t know how to tell the truth because she didn’t know it. They talked and after that her and the new girl became great friends. But that night was not over she followed him to there spot, they talked and had what she thought was a wonderful night together. she found out that he still did not want to more then friends and that night was just all about a quick make up f**k.
Nothing much changed but he did ask her out, in the end she may have forced him to with all her bitching and whining. She though she was happy because she got what she wanted but all he did was talk about being with others even talk about being with the one he was still in love with maybe he felt to tied down. That’s all he talked about was he didn’t want to be tied down, but he would still say “ I love you” and tell her how much he wanted to be with her but couldn’t.
She couldn’t take the tricks and mind games. She ended it, he called the one he thought he was in love with and wanted her back. She broke his heart and that night the girl had to comfort her best friend, the guy she realized she was in love with. She watched him break over another girl, but she was still there for him she was still by his side.
From then on he tried to pull away but she couldn’t let him do it. He would tell her over and over he just wanted to be friend. She agreed to what ever he wanted to make him happy, but she would always go back on what she agreed to. Her mistake was changing for him trying to become the perfect girl for him. They started to pull away from each other.
She gave up and slept with another. Someone who showed her affection, someone who did not hide her. He was even a married man. That only lasted a week, but it was a week she would never forget she felt like she was a queen. Even now I don’t think anyone really understands why she slept with another, maybe now they will.
The other guy left and she went on a short vacation. Something terrible happened to her that she chose to ignore. Three guys did to her what no guy should ever do. She came back broken. He wanted to fix her. The day she got back she acted different and he wanted to know why, after a lot of trouble she told him. He wanted to comfort her, he wanted to make things right. After a week of being away from her he wanted to spend some time with her.
They went some where quiet, two of there friends were there with them, everything was calm and relaxing. He wanted to hold and kiss her. He said how much he missed her. She shied away at first but relaxed around him, he is her best friend she could trust him and she was happy to feel wanted by the one she love. In the middle of everything he pulled away and told her how he might be getting laid that upcoming weekend. She stopped and pilled inside herself. She tried to be alright, but nothing changed. She wanted to throw her life away. She felt she deserved nothing, she felt like a dirty w***e, just someone to be used and tossed away. Her mind started to slip away, but no one would let that happen. She became destructive to her self, she remembers nothing, but all her friends helped her though. Even he helped a little.
She became herself again, but everything went back to normal. The only things was he wanted to take here away for a short bit and he did. For two weeks they were gone, the fought but she was happy, he was so caring and loving. She was so happy. When they came back he admitted they were together, before he even told her. It only lasted a week because she was leaving for good and not coming back.
She left and to this day she thinks that he only said they were together just to make her happy and to stop bitching. He brought her close, he made her trust him. He shattered everything her heart, mind, and soul. Even now he continues to deny her over the phone, but does not want to stop talking to each other because he does not want to lose her friendship he says. He has even said that he did not want to be with her because he felt they would be to serious and would lead to something long term. If he really felt that way wouldn’t he want to be with her?
She lays heart broken and sad waiting for him to call her, but he never does. She puts her self through hell just to get that chance to talk to him.
The beautiful part is she still loves him, still wants to be by his side even as a friend. The tragedy is she will always continue to think that he loves her and she has will still have a chance with him. She put herself in he own hell because she will never move on.
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