Desensitizing

I’ve been thinking a lot and I’ve been here before
Caring too much, feeling too strongly, opening myself up to be hurt
Pain being felt on a different level until it reaches a threshold
A breaking point that forces a change in me
Attempting to take it all in stride and make me stronger
But my mind fights a battle that it always seems to win
Desensitizing me until I feel nothing at all
The anguish too much to process so I disengage from my heart
Caring too little, feeling too faintly, closing myself off completely
Giving up joy to feel no sorrow, anger traded for indifference
Controlled by apathy, I swiftly become detached
Dissociating from my emotions and losing myself to numbing thoughts
Those dying feelings being reduced to a faded memory
Falling into a familiar pattern of mindless, lethargic progress
Chasing after empty accomplishments to distract from monotony
My self-worth manifested by my will to be alone
Relying on nothing but what is in my head

Reviews

[John Alexander McFadyen]

And that is exactly why you are a poet, a creative soul. Most creative people have an internal struggle and in this piece you describe it well ion a good descriptive free verse.