Tire

I go down to the pub
On different nights

But...

It is always the same night
With the same faces
The same jokes
The same stories

I could try a different drink
But scotch serves me well
The drink is not the problem

Tonight I left early
I walked the same streets
I've known since I was a child

I see an old tire
Leaning against a dumpster
It doesn't belong there

I give it a final run
It has probably touched every street
So I roll it through alleys
Places it's never been

Places I've never been

Reviews

[Mother Maggie]

I perceive the old tire as you or as your experiences up ontil that point. New alleys, new trails, new experiences--the speaker in the poem is waking to the fact that it's time for something new. I also see a message that 'No matter how much you've experienced or seen or done or learned, there is always so much more out there, and there comes a point in ones life to find it.'

Namaste and Blessed Be

[Bjarte Knutson]

Yes, no matter how much we experience, the time is short... I will never be everywhere I would like to be, I must also appreciate those familiar faces and symbols that I often feel are mundane...but I must also be willing to go off the treaden path to embrace all that there is. Namaste you as well :)

[Trigorin]

Not bad. Clear image, and I think the clipped tone suits this nicely. I don't really like the ellipsis in the third line - feels like it slows things down too much. Other than that, though, well done.

[Bjarte Knutson]

Thank you for the review, and I understand what you say...it is not criticism of me, but yes, of my writing. I am outsider, I write as the mind dictates, and perhaps my mind creates ellipsis which is not beneficial of my happiness :) I take your point with grace, and hope to make it benefit me. My writing is raw reflection of inner workings, and they are not perfect, so I do not expect to create anything perfect. I also enjoy your writens. "Cycle" is very nice :)

[Ravyne Hawke]

I love that although this appears simplistic, it is filled with wonderful images and a message of taking a different road and an adventure. Most excellent.

[Bjarte Knutson]

Thank you very much. Yes, I write simply, and I am relatively simple! That which we strive for is to make the complex simply, I do not know if complex is so much good, so I do not take offense at being simple. I just appreciate and am honored that you enjoy what I write as you are a person who can appreciate the simple.

[Emily B]

thank you for taking me to places i've never been

looking forward to reading more of you

[Ufi Auttorri ~ Amy C. T..]

Ho! That's the way to jump the rut, to seek adventure and new horizons. In this case, the road less travelled. My very best applause to you and this poem. A deep draught you drank that night.

[anamezic]

You capture such an elegant moment without using a large vocabulary. I'm not sure if the lack of such is a strength or a weakness in general, but it definitely works for this poem. You had me right there with you, as a student about to leave her hometown for the first time, i have grown so tired of my streets, pubs, even friends, but there are always these moments of childlike discovery where you realize you have not yet experienced all that there is to offer.
Wonderful work.

[Astro]

That voice, pines for new territory, new love, new life. That old tire, still finds new ground, keeping it rolling but ever closer to bare. I feel your longing in this piece, there isn't a lot of simile or, metaphor but the imagery contains such a clear emotion. Great work.

[TLK]

"The drink is not the problem" is so pointed that I could taste the daggers in my mouth.

That comes back, swallowed and shrouded in what might be pity, in the equivalence between narrator and tyre in the last two lines.


In my library it goes. I've also read requested some peeps who might come along to smash up 'yo crib.