JOURNEY FOR JOURNEY

Life is a journey, a preparation for the safe journey

Never today expect the day next

Wish always a free unfolded hand

Liberate me from worries, busies distracted,

To Him wait eagerly to meet,

     Bother never the tasty rich to have

     Any thing, for the belly needs, satisfied.

     Only to cover the nakedness, the cloths, 

     Glittering, fashionable I fear.

The warm and winter to keep from

Enough this shelter to stay in.

To you very little to exchange, dumb

But plenty to Him happily.

     Sure, with me You always

     Courage, happiness, freedom along with.

sayed thangal

Reviews

[Kristina Moulaison]

I loved this line..."Wish always a free unfolded hand"...what a lovely summary of this call to live a simple life where character and happiness is placed above materialistic desire. Your spirit speaks through your writing.

[SAYED THANGAL]

well spelled words dear, thanks a lot dear

[Vidya Bacchus]

This was so beautifully penned Sayed :)

[Saddam]

Never today expect the day next
Wish always a free unfolded hand
This first stanza tells all about this poetry. Lovely was this.

[SAYED THANGAL]

thanks a lot for your feed back

[Saddam]

you are welcome dear friend.

[Violet's Run]

The poem flows smoothly from one image to the next as you review the aspects of your life and
values . what is important.. It just stands out as a jewel to me.. Very well done and simple in a way my spirit finds very sweet...
susan

[SAYED THANGAL]

thanks for the positive feed back

[Daniel Sala]

A lovely poem, flows so nicely, a delight to read.

[SAYED THANGAL]

thanks a lot my dear

[Praveeta]

Appreciation of basic needs such as food, shelter and clothing and focusing on key elements: courage, happiness and freedom in daily lives.

Thanks for conveying meaningful messages.

[SAYED THANGAL]

thanks dear for your positive and encouraging feed back

[Praveeta]

You are welcome, Sayed.

[Tam Warink]

Sayed, while your poem is intelligible it lacks a native speaker's articulation and idioms. Please, permit me to demonstrate:

Never today expect the day next
>> Never expect tomorrow today (or) we are not promised tomorrow
Wish always a free unfolded hand
>> What does it mean to desire that our hands be "free" and "unfolded"? [this is a cultural idiom that probably requires an explanation to be clearly understood]
Liberate me from worries, busies distracted,
>> Free me of worry and distraction.
To Him wait eagerly to meet,
>>Wait eagerly to meet Him. [persumably 'Him' refers to God or someone special since it is capitalized.]
Bother never the tasty rich to have
>>Do not worry about accumulating wealth. [Assuming 'rich' refers to material wealth and not taste/food/flavor.]
Any thing, for the belly needs, satisfied.
>>This is too obscure to translate but a guess would be: If you have food to eat then be satisfied.
Only to cover the nakedness, the cloths,
>>Again obscure but a guess: Clothing is only for covering nakedness.
Glittering, fashionable I fear.
>>Guessing (again): That which glitters may seem fashionable (or in vogue, or in style.)
The warm and winter to keep from
>>Ambiguous. It could mean: One should keep from winter (because it is cold) and summer (because it is warm) ... or ... It is good to be warm in winter because winter is cold.

Enough this shelter to stay in.
>> It is enough that I have shelter (from the heat and cold)..
To you very little to exchange, dumb
>> Ambiguous. Perhaps: You are ignorant so there are few thoughts we can exchange. ...or... I have little to offer. I feel dumb (stupid, ignorant?). [The order and words make a huge difference!]
But plenty to Him happily.
>> Assuming 'Him' refers to God or someone special: I will give plenty to Him happily.
Sure, with me You always
>> 'Sure' (a certainty) .. You will be with me always. [Where 'You' is 'Him' ...as before.]
Courage, happiness, freedom along with.
>> Ambiguous because the assumption of object is "You"; perhaps: I have courage, happiness and freedom (as long as) I am with Him.

I don't know how helpful any of this will be. I'm just trying to help you connect the words. There are certain rules of grammar and cultural idioms of the English language that are difficult to explain. I'm certain I would understand even less in your first language. By the way, what is your first language?

[SAYED THANGAL]

Thanks a lot sir, definitely those corrections are helpful, the changes will be included when edit my poems. As I belong to Kerala, one of the states of India, my first language is Malayalam.

[Tam Warink]

Thank you, Sayed. That is kind of you to reply. I was once introduced to Telugu by a friend but have long since forgotten everything. Sanskrit is on my list of things to study. I'm sure it's very difficult too. Perhaps you can tell me if it means anything to dream of elephants?

[SAYED THANGAL]

It's a saying that nothing is impossible, Telugu is some more related to Malayalam, both of them are the by product of the Aryan language.

[Sami Khalil]

You have summed up marvelously in this spiritual write the three things most people want : Courage , happiness and freedom. Once they can attain them their lives will be satisfied and pleasurable...Bravo.............

[SAYED THANGAL]

so encouraging from your part, thanks

[Sami Khalil]

My pleasure...Any time...:).......................

[Frieda P]

Be content with simple pleasures and try to be kind, live your life to the fullest, never know what tomorrow will bring, words to live by sayed, nicely pen'd.

[SAYED THANGAL]

positive feed back, thanks a lot dear

[SAYED THANGAL]

It's a new one, having a spiritual touch, share your views.