Perpetuation (52 stories in a year #3)

From prompt: 'Sons and Daughters'

A woman is laid upon a birthing bed; legs spread apart, shoulders hunched so that her sweat drenched face looks horizontally the length of her body as she pushes in time with the contractions that convulse from her abdomen.

She growls her pain through teeth clenched in pain, anger and dismay until overcome from the considerable effort and rests her head back to the pillow; looking skywards from weary eyes as she staves off exhaustion through concentrated determination.

She screams in sudden agony as natures process of perpetuation continues unbidden.

‘Push!’ someone says in encouragement

‘Almost there!’ says another

A brand new life is on its way…

…and so baby begins her life- completely dependent on others- helpless, she prefers to be left undisturbed as she sleeps throughout most of her first two months.

 

She survives on instinct; crying her only means of communication to the strange new world around her. Baby cries for food, when she’s in pain, discomfort or seeks company, she will be startled by sudden noises and will turn to a light- providing it’s not too bright.

Usually contented near her main carers, she will glance briefly at a face or turn to the breast, suckling for food or seeking comfort. The sound of a voice will make her hush in fascination then, realising she has a voice of her own she begins to mimic the sounds and tones she hears. These origins of speech develop alongside a social smile. She is learning to be a person; realising that she can affect the huge world that surrounds her and cause reaction, she begins to make her place in the world.

The baby knows to stop crying when a familiar person gives her the attention she craves. She gurgles and chatters to herself as she explores the sounds she can create.

Soon she will sleep less in the day and more through the night giving opportunity for her to further explore her senses.

Looking to see, listening to hear, touching to feel- recognising smells and appreciating taste. Gradually she learns more about the world that she has found herself part of.

As her development advances she will reach for a human face and focus on Mum or Dads’ expressions during feeding. This will teach her to articulate emotion and to recognise it in others- especially in relation to herself. Using primitive sounds to get a response from her main carers she has her first conversations. Gurgling and gesturing, then pausing for her carers response she has taken a huge step in understanding social behaviour.

Baby craves as much communication as possible and, if she’s given this attention, will become more attentive and curious of her surroundings and at the age of six months will have developed at a dramatic rate.

She laughs to express excitement and delight.

She has formed a strong attachment with her parents and is usually more reserved around strangers.

She plays simple games like “peek-a-boo” and is forming strong opinions about her likes and dislikes.

She can express her wishes with body movement- reaching for those she has learned to love.

The more baby can move unaided, the more she loves to play- the more she plays, the more she learns. She knows her name by now and understands simple words like ‘yes’ and ‘no’ and she tries to copy this basic language along with simple movements like patting and clapping.

Learning to shuffle, crawl, then walk her curiosity heightened with each milestone reached, her confidence high, but so still her dependency. Those closest to her act as a safe platform from which she can explore the world; showing off to attract attention, (especially if she’s applauded for doing so), and becoming more inquisitive about other children, (but during these egocentric stages she will most likely become jealous if she feels they are getting her attention).

A daily routine is essential as her emotions develop more fully and cause her to feel insecure. These insecurities may manifest as intense and unpredictable swings of mood and fluctuations in dependency and need. She may be defiant and possessive as she asserts her individuality, but has yet to grasp the concept of the individuality of others so it may be difficult to reason with her- even for her own benefit.

As she makes her stand to establish herself within the social group and as a person in her own right, it is essential that those around her show patience, using only light forms of punishment and only if absolutely necessary, as she internalises the views and values of those around her into her belief system. The behaviours she mimics during play describe what she has learned and are the signs of her adapting to social interaction.

As the child- who we will refer to as ‘toddler’ from this point as she doesn’t like being called ‘baby’- reaches her second year she has acquired a wide range of social skills- including language, empathy and a more responsive attitude. She will take part in singing and story telling without prompting as she develops her sense of independence, although the toddler is still very much dependent on her carers socially and emotionally she is capable of autonomous decision making about how she behaves. Certain aspects of her impulsive behaviour can be monitored, checked and limited in order to help her realise her development potential. She may make demands of her carers and be impatient when her requests are not met immediately or become irritable and/or aggressive if they are declined! She is possessive of her own toys and belongings, but is beginning to take part in interactive games with other children, such as role-play.

Gender becomes important as an integral part of her identity and social standing. Interaction with other children reinforces the concept of gender roles she has thus far garnered from family life. Playing in groups, alone and at make believe games all stimulate her imagination and understanding of emotions. She is also more adamant to see activities through to their conclusion, (as she sees it anyway), as her concentration span increases.

At the age of three the toddler is usually happier within herself as, with understanding, acceptance and love, her loved ones are helping her to understand the sophistication of her emotions. This newfound security will gradually enable her to adapt more readily to new environments away from her primary carers. Attending playgroup sessions alone may aid her social and emotional development around this time, but not always.

 

Less rebellious in her nature, she can wait for her needs to be met. Her powers of reasoning have developed as she has been taught the virtues and benefits of patience. This allows her to behave appropriately within varying social settings, adapt to and adopt the mannerisms and moods of those around her.

 

From both the child and the adult perspective patience has been rewarded.

 

The girl, as she now prefers to be seen, is becoming more assured and is adapting to a much larger world away from her adult carers. She may regress to behaviour patterns inherent in earlier development stages, (tantrums, stubbornness and otherwise defiant retaliation), as she adjusts, but there are many more positive aspects to her behaviour as she reaches her fourth year.

 

Through regular interaction with others she has learned to share more fully and participate in group activities. She is very sociable and enjoys conversations with children and adults; learning to take turns in shared activities and developing a strong sense of past and future in relation to the here and now.

 

Her sense of adventure reaches previously unattainable heights and the prospect of short sojourns away from home may be considerably attractive.

 

Although more in control of her emotions and able to comprehend the moral and social standards taught to her, she still tests the boundaries of acceptable behaviour. There may be occasions when she is stubborn, dogmatic or argumentative, seemingly over the most random of things, but this is probably in order to gain attention. When her behaviour is unacceptable she may attempt to transfer the blame to others; perhaps ashamed of breaking the moral codes of those she looks to for approval- those she has learned to see as arbitrators of what is right and what is wrong.

 

The girl is more independent than at any other time on her life, but still turns to an adult for comfort and assurance when distressed in any way.

 

During the latter stages of formative development she is able to express a wide range of emotion and use these appropriately in a many social capacities. Slowly but surely she is becoming more independent, more self-confident and more co-operative.

 

She is developing rapidly and may occasionally be rebellious, irritable, possessive or jealous although she is far more in control than previously. Mood swings are less common, but still evident in her personality. She may be very critical of herself or her work and become withdrawn and unhappy, lethargic and apathetic, aggressive and insular as a consequence.

 

Her gender may dictate the circle of friends with which she is involved and this group’s capacity to influence her views and values may be as strong, if not stronger, than any before. As such the pivotal aspects of her growing awareness of the wider world are peer pressure and role models and it is important that negative influences are offset by those of more favourable persuasion.

 

By the age of eight many aspects of her complex and sophisticated personality have evolved to their fundamental entirety.

 

Her social, cultural and personal identity; her attitude to gender roles, authority figures and the world in general are the foundations of what will inevitably be the adult…

 

An eight year-old girl is curled on her side, knees to her chest, on her bed; tears streaming from her eyes, her hands clasped over her ears to blot out the sounds of the angry shouting and violent crashing coming from downstairs. She grits her teeth in angst as she hears the sickening thud of her mother being assaulted by her father once again.

A brief silence follows the impact of the fall, which is first broken by her mother’s awful wailing and complaint then joined by her father’s sorrowful utterances of apology.

The girl is not surprised by the outcome; she has become capable of predicting the end result with astounding accuracy.

It is always this way when they’ve been drinking and she has also learned that it is wise to keep a safe distance from the domestic conflict.

After a short while the girl sits up and wipes the tears from her reddened cheeks, sighs wistfully then reaches for her favourite teddy bear. She understands that the altercation is over for the night and having seen that the time is 3:49 a.m. makes the independent decision to sleep for as much of the three hours and eleven minutes as possible before she has to get up and ready herself for another day at school.

She crawls beneath her blankets and closes her eyes against the grim reality of her existence. She smiles as she thinks of the things she and her friends may get up to tomorrow.

Eventually tiredness overcomes her senses and conscious thought fades to dreams of a brand new life.

 

Author's Note

Based on an assignment I wrote for college many years ago.