IX

After Anna had reached the bottom of the tall stone stairs, she stood looking up to the tops of the enormous trees.  She felt that this forest was even older than the one she had already traveled through, if that was even possible.  A breeze started up, running alongside the cliff, chilling Anna a bit.  She pulled her sweater closed and folded her arms, trying to keep in the little warmth she had.  She felt so alone.  She missed her mother and desperately needed accompaniment.  The fairies were there, but she could not feel comfort in their arms.  The task seemed so daunting at this point and she was not eve able to help the Drigons.  She felt defeated.  Falling down to her knees in the grass before the wood, Anna began to cry softly.  The tears ran down her rosy cheeks and fell onto her dirtied skirt.  She did not feel like going on and did not know if she even could.

 

As Anna sat there alone, the wind continued to blow.  Suddenly, through the breeze, Anna heard something very faint.  She stopped crying and as the tears began to dry on her cheeks, she listened intently for what she had heard.  She heard nothing for a moment but then once again, she could make out a faint noise.  It sounded like a song.  Anna looked around herself but saw nothing.  The song continued to play and Anna’s eyes fell on the trees.  It seemed to be coming from inside the forest.  Picking up her belongings, Anna walked over to the edge of the woods.  She turned her head to the side and put her ear to the trees.  She could still hear the song, and it seemed as though it might have been a bit louder.

 

Anna began walking through the thick forest, following the song over and under the ancient foliage.  The deeper she went, the darker it got, but the louder the song became.  It never was deafening, but she could clearly hear it through the trees.  As she pushed through the forest, she could see light peering through the space between the leaves.  Finally, Anna pushed her way to the edge of a small clearing amidst the ancient trees.  In the middle of the clearing, a cloaked figure sat on a rock with its back to her.  It seemed as though it was the source of the song.  As quiet as she could, Anna stepped into the clearing.  As soon as her foot touched the grass, the song stopped and the cloaked figure raised its head.  Anna stood, frozen in place.

 

“Please…remove your shoes.”

 

The voice sounded so familiar to Anna.  Not wanting to upset whatever it was that sat before her, she reached down and removed her shoes and socks.  Stepping once again into the clearing, Anna felt the grass beneath her bare feet.  It was the softest grass that Anna had ever felt.  She felt its warmth rise up through her body.  Slowly, Anna began walking toward the figure, which had begun playing the song once again.  As she came around the front, she could see what instrument the song was coming from.  It was a pan flute.  Anna looked at the shadow covering the figure’s face.  Only the ends of what seemed to be two horns poked out the front of the hood.

 

“Faun?”

 

The figure stopped playing and turned its head toward Anna.  She became a little nervous, but was unsure of what to do.  The figure reached up with one hand and pulled back the hood from its head.

 

“Oh, faun!”  Anna ran up to the faun and threw her arms around him.

 

“Hello my dear.”

 

“I am so glad that it is you.  I am so happy to see you again.”

 

“Pardon?”

 

Anna stepped back from the faun with a puzzled look on her face.  “I am so happy to see you again.”

 

“I am sorry.  I do not understand.  Have we met before?”

 

Anna grew more confused.  “Yes, yes we have, faun.  You told me the story of the earth, of the animals.  You sent me on this journey to stop…them.”

 

“Ah, yes, yes.”

 

“So you remember then?”

 

“Indeed.”

 

“Good.  I am in need of some help—”

 

“Oh no, my dear, I do not remember you.  I remember them, the story, everything; everything but you.  I have heard of you though.  The forest has been talking about you for years.”

 

Anna sat down on the grass and rubbed her head.  “I am so confused.”

 

“So am I.  I have never seen you before in my life.”

 

Both Anna and the faun sat for a moment in the clearing, neither saying anything.  Anna continued to look confused, but the faun sat on the rock looking very unconfused and very calm.

 

“Are you—Do you have any family?”

 

“That is an unusual question to ask someone you just met.”

 

“Yes, I suppose it is.  Well, I am Anna—”

 

“Yes, I know.”

 

“I thought you said that you did not remember me?”

 

“Indeed I did.  That is something.  I suppose what I meant was that I did not remember meeting you before.  I know who you are, yes, but I have never met you in the past.”

 

“I do not think I quite understand, Who are you?”

 

“I am The Keeper of a Secret.”

 

“Then it is you, faun!”

 

“I am a faun.”

 

“No, I know you are a faun, but you are The Keeper of the Secret.  Do you not remember meeting me!?”

 

“The Keeper of a Secret.”

 

“What?”

 

“I am the Keeper of a Secret, not of the Secret.”

 

“What?”  Anna sighed.  She was so confused.

 

“I am the Keeper of a Secret.”

 

“Are they not the same?”

 

“No, there is more than one secret in this world.  There is the one and true Secret, but that is not the secret that I possess.  I keep another secret, one that is not quite so secretive, but still in the truest sense a secret.”

 

“I see.  So you do not live in the cottage in the tree in the other woods?”

 

“I am afraid not.”

 

“This is very strange.”

 

“I can not quite say it is the strangest thing in this world.”

 

“Yes, do you know who keeps The Secret?”

 

“I suppose someone must keep it.  If no one knew it, then no one would know it, and therefore no one could keep it.  Without a secret, there can be no keeper.  If there is no keeper, there can be no secret.  The secret would, then, not be a secret, but be the unknown.  There can be no Keeper of the Unknown because then the unknown would be the known.  Do you follow?”

 

“Yes, I think.  But you haven’t answered my question.”

 

“What was your question again?”

 

“Do you know who The Keeper of the Secret is?”

 

“I do not know.”

 

“You do not know who it is?”

 

“No, I do not know if I know who it is.”

 

“How can you not know if you know who someone is?”

 

“I am quite forgetful.  It has been a long time since I have spoken with anyone.”

 

“Do you know who you are?”

 

“I am The Keeper of a Secret.”

 

“I know, I know.  Do you know what your name is?”

 

The faun sat for a moment with his head cocked to the one side, thinking.  “You know, I have never really thought about it.”

 

“You have never thought about it?  Were you not given a name?”

 

“Who would have given me a name?”

 

“Your parents.”

 

“It has been so long since I have seen anyone, I must have forgotten all about them.  Have I told you that I am forgetful?”

 

“Yes, you have.”

 

“Oh, I am sorry.  Hmmm, my name, my name.”  The faun sat again thinking.  “You know what, we should ask the trees.  They have been around for so long, and they are not quite so forgetful as me.”

 

Anna looked at him.  She was puzzled over how much he was like the other faun and yet he knew nothing about him.  But, as he had said, it was not the strangest thing in the world.  She had certainly seen much stranger things thus far.  “So how do you ask the trees?”

 

“Why, you just ask them of course.”

 

Anna walked over to one of the trees at the edge of the clearing and putting her face near its bark, almost as if whispering in someone’s ear, she quietly asked her question.

 

“What is this faun’s name?”

 

“No, no, no, child.  You must ask them like this.”

 

The faun put the pan flute to his mouth and began to play a soft, peaceful melody.  It was not the same song that had caught Anna’s attention.  She watched as a breeze stirred up and spun around the faun.  It spun faster and faster and then suddenly blew away from him and into the trees.  Anna waited for something more to happen, but nothing did.

 

“Did they answer?”

 

“No, I am afraid they did not.  They must not feel like talking right now, but I am sure they know the answer.”

 

“How did you do that?”

 

“Do what?”

 

“When you asked the trees, I mean, I only assume that you were asking the trees when you played the song.  How did you do that?”

 

“Oh, well, that is the secret that I keep.”

 

“It was amazing.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“So, how did you do that?”

 

“Do you want to know a secret?”

 

Anna was a bit puzzled but shook her head nonetheless.

 

“Come closer.”

 

Anna stepped closer and, looking around, the faun leaned down very close to her face.  He spoke very quietly, whispering.

 

“I do not know.”  The faun began laughing quietly, his raspy voice cracking.  “I do not know.”

 

“If you do not know, then how can you say that you keep a secret?”

 

“Ah, a valid question, Anna.  I did say myself that no one can keep the unknown.”

 

“Then what is your secret?”

 

“I would not be doing a very good job if I did not keep the secret that I am to be keeping.  Why, then, I would not be called the Keeper of a Secret, but the Giver of a Secret.”

 

“Well, maybe that is what you really are.  Maybe you have forgotten.”

 

The faun put the corner of the pan flute in his mouth and bit gently down on it.  “You know, you may be right.  I may not be a keeper after all.”  The faun sat for a moment, mulling over what Anna had said, all the while mumbling to himself.  “What to do, what to do…”

 

“Do you even remember for sure what the secret is that you keep?”

 

The faun looked up at her and then down, once again biting on the corner of the pan flute.

 

“You do not, do you?”  Anna sat down in the grass feeling defeated again.  “Why did I do this?”  She looked up at the faun.  “Who are you?  I thought you were my faun.  I thought you would help me.”  She looked down at the grass and grabbing a handful of the blades, tore them from the ground and threw them aside.  “I do not even know where I am.”

 

The faun took the flute from his mouth and placed it next to him.  He got down from the rock and putting his arm around Anna, knelt beside her.  “My dear, do not fret.  I may not be the faun that you know, but I am here.  You are not alone.”

 

Anna sniffed and wiped a tear from her eye.  “And where are we?”

 

“We are where all hope began, where not a moment of darkness rests.  Anna, this is where the star fell from the heavens.  It landed here and from it stepped the first mother and father.  You must not give up, for if you do at the very beginning of all things, then you will never see what it is that you are fighting for.  Do not lose your hope, your courage, your love.  With these three, there is nothing that can stop you.  All that is good is on your side.  It is with you in every step of your journey.  You are our love, Anna.  You are our courage.  You are our hope.”

 

Anna looked up into the face of the faun and from his gentle eyes fell a single tear.

 

“You are the Giver of a Secret, faun…and you have just given it to me.   Thank you.”  Anna put her arms around the faun and hugged him.  “I can not thank you enough.”

 

“Now child, you must go.”

 

“You can not come with me?”

 

“I can not.  This is where I belong, here, to watch over this sacred ground.”

 

“I understand.”  Anna stood up and gathered her things.  “Thank you, faun.  I will not forget you.”

 

“Nor will I forget you.”

 

Anna smiled and turned into the forest once again, unsure of what lay ahead but with a new sense of hope.