I Danced in the Rain

I Danced in the Rain

A Poem by ladywriter
"

A short poem on how I was feeling when my dad went through chemotherapy and had issues with him and our relationship.

"

I danced in the rain

To toss and turn

Away my pain

 

I jumped and twirled

'Round and 'round

Until my pain came falling down

 

Rain whispered songs

Into my ears

'Til it ran away my fears

 

Down inside

The back of my mind

Until it comes back

Another time

 

To remind me of

All my pain

Until it all comes back again

 

I'll stare at my window

And wait for the day

That I can again dance

My pain away

© 2008 ladywriter


Author's Note

ladywriter
Tell me what you think of my poem, I am open to all suggestions.

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Reviews

this poem was extemely heart felt. the flow was amazing with the short bars and the imagery was as well, wonderful. you're a great writer from what i've read so far.

i also noticed that you're new to the site so i wanted to be one of the first to give you a big welcome and hopefully you continue to post on the site and share your wonderfully written work. im sure you will love this site because it has tons of amazing writers on here such as yourself. anyway, like i said, welcome to the site. and be sure to let me know when you post up more work so i can be sure to read them as well.

take care and have a wonderful blessed week and weekend. much love and peace.

Posted 16 Years Ago


Beautiful. Each stanza flowed perfectly into the next. With just twenty short lines, you are able to hook the reader and draw them into your moment in the rain. Keep up the good work.

Posted 16 Years Ago


very smooth!

Posted 16 Years Ago


I liked this poem a lot as it shows how one responds to letting go pain, if even for a moment in different ways. Rain seems to be cathartic for many people, it's like it washes away everything. I am a cancer survivor and went through Two different bouts of radiation treatment, so I can if only a bit understand the worry you must have had for your father during this time.

I watched my family worry and suffer almost as much as I did. Very emotional piece.

Posted 16 Years Ago


Wonderful write. Heartfelt. Thank you for sharing

Posted 16 Years Ago


Oh, it's simply lovely! Welcome to WC! This was a great start for you. Very good rhyming, and it reads very smoothly. Great job!

Posted 16 Years Ago



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156 Views
6 Reviews
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Added on May 15, 2008
Last Updated on May 19, 2008

Author

ladywriter
ladywriter

Jasper, AL



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