WINDIGO

Windigo - a creature or spirit that either possess characteristics of a human or a monster that had physically transformed from a person and feeds on human flesh..

Your smile, those lips so toxic, they will forever haunt my thoughts

No matter how fake it seemed I fell for it & got addicted

Love, lust or both I spent most times debating what it was

I was delusional, maybe I overdosed on my meds

 

Your eyes, i always wondered what it was about them

In my eyes I saw a girl in love, in reality you were just luring me to your cave

My sweet slumber was cut short by your sharp teeth sinking in.

Every time I try to sleep I see those seductive inviting eyes, I AM HAUNTED

 

Tender & innocent I believed you were heaven sent, I let my defences down

I tried to resist but you pulled me with your sweet words & grey promises

I LOVE YOU, just random words that actually meant nothing to you

I tried to run, but you did what you do best emotional manipulation, I stayed

 

Windigo is what I can call you, you fattened me up before the feast

You ate everything, no left overs just a dark hole in my heart

You feasted on the love, innocence & you even had the trust for dessert

In the processes you turned me into you, someone who feeds on innocent juicy hearts

Reviews

[Zoë]

This is really good! You manage to squeeze a lot of imagery and emotion into a short piece and invoke many feelings throughout.
I'm not very good with poetry, so there's not much I can do in terms of critiquing. But I felt like the last line was kind of abrupt or cut short. For how emotional this poem was the last line just didn't do it for me. Since your other stanzas are five lines I feel like you could go into your last stanza and extend it by adding another line. Maybe expand how he feeds on innocents, or how he feels like he can never escape her. You could even expand on the hole left in his heart.
Over all your piece is amazing, I really liked it and I'm glad I read it. But with such a moving piece I feel like you can make a better ending that that :)

A little piece of advice. When it comes to conclusions, whether it's in poetry or prose, always look at it like you just gave this great speech. Now, can you imagine your self dropping the mic and at the end and walking off stage being surrounded by a standing ovation? If you can't, your conclusion isn't strong enough. So, whenever you write the ending to something, always look at it from a "can I drop the mic?" stand point, and your conclusions with rock every time ^^

[Dash the Reaper]

i am glad you noticed that the end was cut short,recently i have been toying with idea of linking my poems,as i noted above this poem follows after love lust or both,and i am still working on the 3rd poem after this one.. I figured cutting it short would make the beginning of the poem to follow more enticing.And about the conclusions tip i agree with you 100%. thanks for the review it helped a lot

[Zoë]

Ah okay. In that case you may want to label your poems as prt. 1, 2, or 3. That way people know for sure that this is part of a set.

[Emily]

Very well written!!
Keep it up!!

[matpat]

I enjoyed it! Very good job!!

[Dash the Reaper]

thanks for the review

[Riddhi]

I enjoyed it....and it was really interesting...Keep on writing and thanks for sharing...

[Dash the Reaper]

i am glad you liked it.thanks for reviewing

[Alexandra Hounschell]

I love the tales of Windigos. I've always found them so interesting, and skin-walkers too. This is a very good piece. Well done.

[Dash the Reaper]

thanks for reviewing

[Dash the Reaper]

A continuation from the poem love lust or both... hope you like it