A world within four walls. [Together then apart]

Afternoons spent thinking of you.

If I were with you this moment

As the sun kissed you good morning,

I'd pull you away, jealous of her golden rays.

Keep you hidden from daylight

Knowing it meant you have to leave.

Your limbs entangled in mine,

I'd ask you to stay five minutes longer

Hoping you know I secretly mean forever

Each kiss would last a lifetime, 

Our minds shut to the world outside.

Echoing laughter, sunflower smiles

Looks that kill when 

Creases form at your eyes

In that instant, my world is complete

Over-sized sweatshirts, you & me.

But all that remains of us

Are these thoughts I hide away

In books you'll never see

It's time for me

To snap out of my reverie.

Author's Note

I was a little confused picking a gender for the sun. Thank you to those of you that helped me decide!
Feedback is appreciated :)

Reviews

[1SP]

This is a rather romantic in a sense of waking up next to someone and longing for around round. :) But enough about me, this is an okay piece you have here with the creative bounce of genders which brings a balance... sorta like the balances of life. #KeepPosting

[T]

Professionally done. I like it.

[Shane Mohamed]

This carried a great meaning. I felt the struggle you carried across the female in the relationship, or at least that was my perspective. It's packed with emotion. Very genuine work. Thank you for sharing.

[Spacecadet]

Thanks Shane, I appreciate your comment :) in glad you like it.

[Michael (Letters and Li..]

"I'd ask you to stay five minutes longer
Hoping you know I secretly mean forever" - Beautiful lines. Very sweet poem. I enjoyed it very much!

[Spacecadet]

Thank you for stopping by! :)

[Shaquana Adams]

Cute poem. It has a really good flow to it :)
-QuanaWana

[Spacecadet]

Thank you! :)

[MAC]

oh my spacey, you write passion and emotions of love very well.....amazing write

[Spacecadet]

Thank you Mark! Unfortunately my poems are inspired by personal experiences :/ I'm glad something comes off them!

[MAC]

tis what makes the best poetry dear Spacey....everybody has personal experiences but few can use it to write poetry like this.

[Spacecadet]

You're too kind, dear friend :)

[StrixNebulosa]

I can feel the warmth between the lines... there should be no "confusion", this blended quite nicely

[Spacecadet]

Thank you so much :)

[DrD]

There is much to like about this work. The engulfing possessiveness that often comes with love and all its passions. Delicately worded but with a raw undertone, this is a writing in the style I like most. I truly enjoyed it.

[Spacecadet]

Thank you for taking the time to review my poem, DrD. I'm glad you like it and your words are appreciated :)

[Sourav]

I liked & enjoyed this emotional and passionate poem. It's sweet, simple yet kind of melancholic. Nice write.

[Spacecadet]

Thank you, I'm glad you did :)

[paul sal.....]

send a copy of your book to the other half of us

[Spacecadet]

My book is top secret but if you're lucky you'll catch glimpses of it in my upcoming work :)