While you weren't looking

While you weren't looking

A Story by Spacecadet
"

A story in just a few lines, Inspired by the concept of 'terribly tiny tales'.

"
And in the dark of the night
Took place the greatest theft 
Of all times
He offered her his heart
But she stole his soul and fled
Leaving him lifeless on the ground

© 2014 Spacecadet


Author's Note

Spacecadet
I'd love to know if this would work better as a poem.

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Reviews

This is very profound my dear.Beware of offering things in the dark lol.You never know how it will end when you risk your heart I guess :)

Posted 10 Years Ago


Spacecadet

10 Years Ago

But it's a risk you gotta take!
Thanks for the review Vidya! :)
Vidya Bacchus

10 Years Ago

Yes you are very right ,You are most welcome :)
Works well either way...very understandable...

Enjoyed it.
Scott

Posted 10 Years Ago


Spacecadet

10 Years Ago

Thank you Scott :)
Scott Metro

10 Years Ago

:)
Scott.....
Okay, so I have to be honest, and say that when I first read through this I didn't really consider it a story. I actually thought of it more as a poem. However, after reading through it again, and reading the tag line above, the whole idea of this 'tiny tales' or micro-story really sunk in. I found it really cool. So much was said in just 33 words, and I'm not sure that it could be any better if it was dragged out into several pages. You did such a fantastic job of making it so incredibly visual and gripping, and you barely needed any words to do so (less than what I am using now!!!). The more I think about this, the more I am amazed by not only the concept but also the great writing. Well done. I'd seriously love to read more of these types of stories.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Spacecadet

10 Years Ago

Wow, thank you for your incredibly kind words and taking the time to really analyse this and look at.. read more
this is so nice..and well that shows that girls can be lairs too..sorry but its the truth....
well done :)

Posted 10 Years Ago


Could be a realistic tale. A lot of thief of the soul willing to leave you for dead. You sad a lot in a few words. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

Posted 10 Years Ago



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Stats

154 Views
5 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on February 25, 2014
Last Updated on February 25, 2014
Tags: Terribly tiny tales, Experimenting, Story, Short, Dark, Night, Theft, Love, Betrayal

Author

Spacecadet
Spacecadet

About
I'm a student, moody writer and keen discoverer of soulful writing. Everything I write is right from my heart. Being a hopeless romantic, my favorite genre to read and write is romance. Heartbreak mak.. more..

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